His Heart
by Carelise682
Summary: Carrie fell in love with the Inquisitor the moment she laid eyes on him . Will he return her feelings or will she get hurt?.
1. Chapter 1

His Heart

Chapter 1

She stood watching the refugee camp from the battlements . People looked like ants from there . Carrie knew she was more fortunate than those left to stay in tents on the river bank down below . She was one of Lord Inquisitor Maxwell Trevelyan's inner circle . A privilege only a few people had and she was lucky to have that . She was furious at this very moment at being left out of this new mission . It would be the first one since they had come to live here . The Inquisitor had decided on a small group and there was nothing the rest of them could say to change his mind . She so wished that she could go . She felt for him since she laid eyes on him for the first time and wished to stay by his side always . He was oh so sexy but that wasn't all . He was a man in the real sense of the word . He had the tan of someone who were mostly outdoors at daytime . He was tall with dark hair cropped short and green eyes shining like emeralds . He had the most kissable lips she had ever seen on a man .His nose were those of an aristocrat and that gave his face more character . Oh and not to talk about his broad shoulders . She sighted ,fanning herself with her hand . Then she brought herself back to reality by forcing the bitter thought of him not noticing her even when she accompanied him on missions . She had to admit she wasn't as beautiful and intriguing as most of the ladies on his team . Hell she was a petite girl barely out of her teens . Who wanted someone like her ? .No one really . She sighted again this time with the pain of an unanswered love cutting a hole inside of her .

Footsteps coming from behind her alerted her that she was not alone . She looked behind her to see one of the guards walking past her . She let out her breath slowly , she didn't even know she was holding it . Her eyes darted back to the refugee camp . He would be leaving in two days time and she'd be here wondering how he and his chosen group was doing . He chose only three people . Solas , Varric and that stupid horned Quinari who talked about sex a lot . The Iron Bull . Yeah that's what his name is . She sighted again . She felt sorry for herself and those who had to stay behind . She knew Cassandra wasn't happy with that decision either but she didn't know why ,maybe the Seeker had feelings for the top man too . She looked behind her as she heard footsteps again . It wasn't a guard this time . It was Varric the only dwarf in their circle . ''Admiring the view ,Kiddo ?'', he asked with a concerned look on his face . She turned back to watch the camp and nodded . Varric was the only one who knew how she felt about their leader but she knew he wouldn't tell anyone because he could keep secrets very well . ''You know everyone saw how mad you were when you stormed off after the meeting ,Kiddo , would you care to share what it was all about ?'', he asked coming to stand next to her . She shook her head ,she didn't want to give the embarrassing detail on why she was mad . She kept her eyes on the camp . She didn't want to betray her inner feelings . Varric could read you like a book sometimes . ''Kiddo , I don't mean to pry but things are getting out of hand , if you're so infatuated with our Inquisitor why not just talk to him about it and get it over with ''. That made her look at him . ''No !'', she protested ''he'll just laugh at me or something and then I'll be more miserable than I am now ''. Varric sighted ''Fine then I guess your right but you need to do something about it sooner or later because you're really beginning to look bad out there ''. With that said he walks away shaking his head . Carrie watches him leave with mixed feelings . She decides that she had been moping enough for one day and need to go to her quarters or somewhere else like maybe the tavern where Sera would make her laugh a little .

''Inquisitor may I have a word !'', Maxwell Trevelyan heard the ambassador Josephine Montilyet call as he walked across the courtyard of his new home Skyhold . He stopped and waited for her to catch up with him . ''It's about the girl '', she said as she joined him . ''What about her ?'', he asked not clear what girl she was actually referring to . ''The way she stormed out of the war room after the meeting this morning isn't appropriate behavior for a young lady such as her and so I have been meaning to ask if you are aware that she watches your every move when you are in close proximity like a little love sick puppy ?''. Maxwell frowned as it dawned on him which girl Josephine is talking about . Yes he had noticed it since day one of their meeting . It was a little annoying at sometimes but since he didn't want to hurt her feelings he have been trying to ignore it as best he could but lately he found that things were becoming too much like this morning when she stormed out after his decision to take only three of his team to Crestwood . She gave him a look that gave him the impression that she was very disappointed in him and just left slamming the door shut with such force it made the doorframe shudder . He knew that he had to talk to her about this because it couldn't go on that way . He sighted and turned his head to look down at Josephine . ''I guess it's time to have a word with her then '', he said . Josephine nodded ''Yes , you should '',she says turning to leave . He sighted again watching her leave . He had to do something about the girl and soon too because he would be leaving for Crestwood in two days . He decided then and there that it would be best to get it over with today . Rubbing his head he discarded that decision almost instantly and so he resumed walking to the tavern . He had far better things to do than talk to a damn lovesick girl .

The moment he set foot in the tavern he wished that he hadn't because the girl was there talking to Krem one of the Bull's Chargers . For the first time since they met he had a very good view of her petite frame . Her hair was dark almost black falling in curls down her back ,stopping near her knees . He couldn't see her face , but he remembered it well enough to make his own picture of her . She was slim like an elf and had curves all on the right places such as her hips that he got a glimpse of now . He frowned when he felt his body reacting . He couldn't help but look down to see his manhood straining against his pants . That made him feel embarrassed to say the least , but that wasn't the only reaction he got from his body . No he felt something move inside him like a thousand butterflies and he didn't like the feeling . Groaning inwardly he decided to go talk to Iron Bull just to get something else to do rather than watching a girl who made him feel things he did not intent to feel .

He had to walk past her and tried not to look at her . That was the wrong thing to do because if he had looked he could have prevented what happened next . He was about to walk past when she turned unaware that he was there and crashed straight into him . She lost her balance and if it wasn't for him who reacted instantly by grabbing her around the waist she'd be sitting on her backside right then . He looked down and wished he hadn't because she looked up and met his gaze . Her eyes were almond shaped and the color of rich caramel . She had beautiful rosy full lips and a cute little nose . He couldn't help but get lost in her gaze and felt that feeling stir inside him again .He pulled her closer his lips tingling at the thought of hers touching his , her body pressed softly against his and his manhood straining against his pants again . A warning light goes off in his mind and he let her go so quickly that she almost loses her balance again , but he steadies her by grabbing her arms . Letting go again he turns away walking over to Bull feeling her eyes boring into his back .

Carrie couldn't believe it . He actually held her for a moment . She wanted to jump and scream for joy, but didn't because she didn't want him to know how she felt that moment . She left the tavern after she watched him go over to Iron Bull . Now she was alone in her quarters with a storm inside her . Not a bad one but a good one . She relived that short moment in his arms again and again wishing she could have stayed there longer . His eyes were more beautiful up close and oh those lips . Squealing she jumps up and down hugging herself , feeling his hands on her waist again . She closes her eyes to see more clearly . His eyes gazing into her caramel ones . She sighted with feeling and walked over to her bed ,sitting down because her legs felt like jelly . Oh she wished that moment could have gone on forever . She was sure he was going to kiss her ,his hands had tightened around her waist and he had pulled her closer but something must have gone wrong because he let go of her so quickly that she had no time to react . The alarm in his eyes was more than enough to tell her that he had come to his senses . She sighted feeling that awful pain again of being unwanted . She guess she wasn't good enough for his Lordship and so had to be contend with having felt his hands on her waist for one time only .

She laid down on her bed thinking of her family in some village in the Free Marches over the Waking Sea . Her father worked for a noble who lived in Ostwick and only came to his house in the country once every three weeks . She was the youngest daughter of two hard working parents and had seven other siblings . Her three older sisters weren't married yet just like her .Ronan her oldest brother was married to some girl he met from another village and Gerard her other older brother just didn't see the need of getting married anyway . Gerard was better off than any of them since he had a job at a blacksmith's workshop in Ostwick while the rest of them suffered at home except for her who had to leave her home when she was quite young because she was a mage and had to go live in a circle where she had a different kind of struggle with everything that has going on since the trouble in Kirkwall . She had hated Templar's then who treated mages like animals sometimes . Not all mages did blood magic and if they did , they didn't do it like the Grey Wardens did though some did do it like that .

She was lucky to be alive after what happened at the Conclave , she was last in the long line of mages who had walked side by side with those wretched Templar's so she was only blown backwards by the explosion . She came to on a bed inside a room full of wounded . He was there too at first but they had moved him where she wasn't able to see him . With a sight she decided to get up and go find something to do rather than think about the past or things that couldn't be .

Two days later Carrie watched as the love of her life rode off with his three companions . She stood beside Blackwall wishing with all her heart that she could go with them but those that had been left behind were given a task at the last minute . They were to take provisions to the soldiers at the Crossroads in the Hinterlands as well as in the Fallow Mire . Carrie didn't mind but she didn't believe it was that important a task as the one that the Inquisitor himself was going to do . ''At least we got something to do '',Cassandra says as if she could read Carrie's mind . The others nodded though they too wished that they could have gone with their leader .

Hours later they were on the road to the Hinterlands . They would go to that awful place called the Fallow Mire when they return from the Hinterlands . Vivienne , Blackwall and Cassandra took charge of leading this mission . Walking beside Sera , Carrie wondered if the three of them would keep their cool as leaders since they have already quarreled over which camp they would use in their stay at the Hinterlands . In the end they decided on the one nearest to the Crossroads. Carrie was glad to get some rest . The road to the Hinterlands were long causing them to feel tired at the end of their journey .

The Hinterlands job was easy though they had found bandits on the road just as they walked down the steep path towards the Crossroads .Corporal Vale was glad for the provisions as it was dearly needed he even promised to send the other camps their shares . The Follow Mire , though a bit more dangerous was quicker as it had only two camps . They were back at Skyhold far quicker than they had anticipated . Carrie was glad for this though she wished to have gone with the Inquisitor .

She found work to do while they waited for the Inquisitor to return to Skyhold . She helped Cullen with his paperwork , cleaned Josephine's office and even help Leliana feed her birds . The wait was long and some days she wished that they didn't have to wait .

It was late afternoon one day while she helped Master Dennett to feed the horses when word came that the Inquisitor was on his way . She didn't stop what she was doing although her heart felt like jumping out of her chest at the prospect of setting eyes on him again .

It's much later when she do. The tavern is full of people tonight . She has to search hard for a table to sit down at where she could eat her dinner in peace . She almost gave up when Varric calls to her from a corner . Looking his way was a mistake because right next to him sat the Inquisitor himself . She can't help but stare at him for a moment and when his gaze meets hers her heart skips a beat before thrumming so loud in her ears it feels as if the whole tavern could hear it . That's when she looks away shyly unaware that this brings a smile to his lips . Varric who is unaware of this calls to her again and she have no choice but to walk over there even when her legs feel so wobbly.

''Hey ,Kiddo '', Varric says when she reach them . ''Hi '', is all she can get out . Holding her dinner tightly to make sure she don't let it fall she look the Inquisitors way to try and greet him as well but she fails miserably when she meets his gaze once more . His eyes are more beautiful than she remembers it . In fact his more handsome than ever . ''Hello , Kiddo '', he says with a strange seductive tone in his voice causing her to almost let her tray fall . If it wasn't for Varric who quickly grabbed her tray it would have fallen . Feeling a bit embarrassed she wish nothing more but to go hide under her bed ,but instead she pull out a chair and sit down in the process she almost knocks Varric's drink over . ''Careful , Kiddo !'', he warns . With cheeks growing red she stutters '' S s sorry , Vvvarric ''. Sighting heavily and shaking his head he says ''It's okay ,Kiddo ''. She keeps her head down after this looking at her food only even if she's not hungry anymore . She listen to Varric's story about Crestwood with one ear because of the Inquisitor who is just there across the table and knowing his there and feeling his presence so strongly makes it hard for her to concentrate .

She pushes herself to eat though she can't even taste what goes into her mouth . She try her best to act normal but know she's failing miserably . When her plate is clean she gets up , picking up her tray . Not looking at either Varric or the Inquisitor she turn to leave just to bump into the big Qunari who she doesn't really like . The impact knocks her tray out of her hands . Watching as if in slow motion how the tray flies through the air and crashes right into the inquisitors chest , Carrie feels like the ground beneath her feet should swallow her just then and there .

Hours later after apologizing for the hundredth time Carrie leaves the Inquisitor and Varric to go to her quarters to reflect on how badly her day actually ended and the humiliation she had suffered . The Inquisitors face didn't show any anger when she had helped clean his shirt where her plate had fell on him . At that moment she wasn't thinking of the feelings she had for him she just wanted to get the stains of him . She had tried not to look at him but just couldn't help herself . He looked calm even serene . His eyes didn't even spat fire . He accepted her apology every time she said the word ''sorry ''. What made her feel worse was when the guy who knocked the tray out off her hands laughed and nobody told him to stop laughing not even the Inquisitor .

With a long suffering sigh she falls down on her bed burying her face into her pillow . They could have at least told Iron Bull not to laugh at her but no maybe everyone was enjoying her humiliation too much . A knock on her door made her sit up . She wondered if she should tell whoever it was to go away or to come inside . ''I know you're in there, Kiddo , and I'm not leaving! '', she heard a familiar voice although it was muffled . Her heart skipped a beat at hearing that beautiful deep voice of the Inquisitor himself . ''Open the door , Kiddo , '', His tone was more demanding this time but she didn't know if she should obey or not . She stared at the closed door hoping that he would leave because she didn't want to see him right now . ''If you don't open the door I'll do it myself !'', he warned ''I'm going to count to three ''. She decided to see if he'd really do that . He started to count . She waited in anticipation wishing he'd not do what he said he'd do but there was no such luck for her today because on the count of three the door was pushed open with force and on the threshold stood the lord Inquisitor in all his manly glory .

She stared at him as he stood there , he stared back unwaveringly . ''So you like to play games don't you ? '', he asked with no emotion in his voice . She shook her head and in the process broke the spell that kept their eyes locked . ''Then why didn't you open the door ?'', his voice was still emotionless . Looking down at her hands she wondered if she should answer . ''Answer me !'', he demanded now getting impatient . She looked up again . ''I don't know '', was all she could think of to say . He sighted and took a step into the room pulling the door closed behind him . ''I don't like games '', he said again in an emotionless voice the moments anger forgotten . She didn't say anything back because somehow now being alone with him made her feel shy .

He eyed her for a moment as she tried to look everywhere ,but at him . '' Are you mad at Bull?'', he asks suddenly .

She froze and turned her eyes to meet his again . '' '',she stutters and he somehow understood that she wasn't actually truthful .

''Don't lie to me ,Kiddo ,I know that Bull's laughing made you mad because you had stormed out just when my shirt was clean enough '', he states feeling a bit of anger at her lie .

She felt her cheeks burn with embarrassment while she lowers her gaze . He stared at her knowing somehow that his presence made her feel shy and flustered . He didn't want that . He needed her to be open with him about things .

" I have to go now ,''he says causing her to look up at him again .''I'll be calling a meeting soon ,you'll be expected to attend ''.

She says nothing just look at him with those big beautiful caramel eyes of hers . Bowing slightly with his hands behind his back like a noble should he turns around to leave but swings back to face her again .

"Don't be mad at Bull , he didn't mean to be mean , he just couldn't help to laugh ''.

She stares at him silently , taking in those eyes ,those lips , his nose . _Why does a man have to be so handsome ?._

She combed the big black horse . She had gotten up early not feeling quite rested . Her thoughts had been a swirling mess and it was all the Inquisitors fault . She couldn't sleep much until the small hours of the morning , but then again she only got two hours of sleep.

"Don't comb the horse as if you want to pull out his hair ,Girl,!'', Master Dennett scolds from where he was combing another horse .

She combed slower and gentler hoping to appease the old grump .

She didn't notice when Blackwall stepped out of the barn to chop some wood for his fire at the woodpile . She didn't notice when the Inquisitor came to talk to him . It was only when she was about to put away the that she noticed them . She froze ,but only for a second or two, trying to find a way of moving pass them without them noticing her .

She had no such luck . The one moment he was talking to Blackwall and the next he made his way to her with a determined look on his face .

"Good morning, Kiddo,!'' ,he calls a greeting .

Trying to look everywhere but at him ,she wonders what she could do to get out of a conversation with him .

''You know normally when one calls a greeting the other one greets back '', Maxwell Trevelyan says eyeing her with that emerald eyes of his . He had reached her now and stood there blocking her way of escape .

Looking at the ground she answers stuttering ,feeling embarrassed at her inability to talk properly when he is around .''S..Sorry ,I…Inquisitor , M..M..Morning ''.

''You can look up when you say that '', he says feeling anger at her boil inside him. ''I might think that you are hiding something ''.

His words causes her to look up just to gasp because he was so near she could touch him if she lifted her hand . Stumbling backwards she feels like groaning inwardly . How did he get so near to her without her knowing ?.

For a moment he looked at her as he cooled down a little . It wasn't her fault that she was shy . She must have had a different upbringing than him and didn't talk to others much .

On impulse he stepped forward again closing the gap between them ,ignoring her frantic gaze that swept everywhere ,but over him as she tried to look for an escape . ''Care to go for a ride with me ?'' ,he asks .

Her gaze finally meeting his ,she stills . ''I..I d..don't k..know '', she stutters .

''It's only down the road and back , Kiddo, and I don't bite , neither does Knight ''.

His words were supposed to encourage her ,but she felt more flustered as his words gave her the impression that they'd be sharing his horse .Before she could say a word the sound of someone calling the Inquisitor reaches them ,saving her from accepting or declining .

With a deep sigh he closes his eyes for a moment . ''Now more than ever I wish I had never gone to the Conclave with my aunt '', he grumbles . Then opening his eyes he looks at her ''Well , our ride together is being postponed until further notice , Good day to you , Kiddo ''.

She didn't say anything just watched him walk away with those long strides of his ,feeling rather relieved at this lucky turn of events .

" Are you sure we were all called to attend this damn meeting ?'', Carrie asks as she follows Dorian who had called to her when she had come from helping feed Leliana's birds .

''Of course I am sure '', Dorian says rolling his eyes at her stupid question . She felt a bit stupid but couldn't have helped asking .

They walked through the door that lead to Josephine's office and then onward down the corridor towards the war room .

Carrie looked at the walls of the corridor . On one side it was clean and tidy on the other it was broken and see through . She shook her head wondering when the fixing crew would come and fix it .

She and Dorian was the last two to arrive. Everyone stared at them.

''Glad you could join us out of your oh so busy schedules '', the Inquisitor says coldly glaring at them .

Taking her usual place against the wall Carrie tries not to look at him .

''She were feeding those wretched birds again '', Dorian explains ''I waited for her ''.

''My birds are not wretched !'', Leliana protests angrily .

Holding his hands up in defense Dorian says ''I'm only saying ''.

''Well they're kind of cute '', Carrie puts in surprising not just herself but everyone else.

''Kiddo , Nugs are cute ,not birds '', Varric says laughter in his voice .

She doesn't reply because there is nothing to say on the matter . Her cheeks burned red with embarrassment at her runaway tongue . _Just kill me now !,_ she shouts inside her head .

The Inquisitor clears his throat bringing everyone's attention back to the meeting . He glared at Carrie clearly telling her to shut her mouth with the look he gave her .

''Now that everyone is present even if some were a bit late, I have some news about The Grey Wardens that might interest some of you , we're still trying to figure out things ,but Stroud seems to know a lot about Corypheus and his abilities ,Hawke and he would be going to the Western Approach to investigate anyway that isn't all , a letter came from a man in the Emerald Graves , he knows something and is willing to deal with us if we help him , we might be going to the Exalted Plains soon , ,Josephine has the list of who'll be accompanying me where , we're on a tight schedule so I won't keep you any longer ,but one more thing , it's about the new weapons and armor that Harrit was so nice enough to smith , there aren't enough so you'll just have to decide who gets them and who don't ''.

Carrie was the first to scurry out the door ,afraid that people would stop her . She didn't forget the last time she'd been to a meeting . The Inquisitor might remember that one and she didn't want him to ask questions now .

Maxwell Trevelyan watched the girl leave with mixed feelings . He wanted to call her back ,but that would bring too much attention to himself . He wasn't ready to let the world know that he had certain feelings for her .

''Inquisitor , there is still the matter of…'', Commander Cullen's voice calls him back to reality and his duties as Inquisitor . With a sigh and a shrug he bends over the map while listening to Cullen rambling on about important things that he had to make choices about .

Carrie bend down as she tended to the plants in the garden . The Inquisitor himself had planted these plants . The elf lady who was the gardener here told her that when she offered to help.

Pulling out weeds and watering the plants that needed water soothed her new found anger at all that was unfair in this world of theirs, a little . She had gone with the other three mages to look at the new staffs and mage armor and had found that there were only three of everything . Harrit had told her that he didn't make it for her and had rudely pulled a staff out of her hand . It had made her stumble backwards right into Sera who had been admiring a dagger . Said dagger had cut her left butt cheek and instead of asking if she was alright Sera had yelled at her to watch where she was going . She had left then . With her bleeding wound and all . She had seek out Fiona ,the leader of the mage rebellion to help her heal it and Fiona had helped her with pity in her eyes .

Carrie didn't like people pitying her ,but it had made her feel a bit better especially when she told Fiona about what had happened to her .

The cut was healed ,but it still felt a bit tender when she sat down.

A soft sigh escapes her lips when she straightens to move onto another spot with weeds . She almost bumped into the Inquisitor when she turned to go over to that spot .

She froze when she saw him staring at her intently . ''I…Inquisitor '', she stutters clutching her hands to her chest , backing up a little , as her eyes meets his .

''Varric told me I'd find you here '', he simply says ignoring the fact that he had startled her .

She nods saying ''Oh ''.

''He told me what happened in the armory, are you alright ?''. He sounded genuinely concerned .

She nods again saying nothing , just stare at him feeling a bit awkward for some reason . Varric must have told him where she got hurt and that in itself was rather embarrassing .

''Well , I'm sorry for Sera and Harrit's behavior '', he says frustration boiling inside him at her silence .

Looking down at her dirty hand she nods yet again angering him .

''Don't you have anything better to say than just nod?'', he asks his voice cold .

Looking up at him again she shrugs causing him to feel so angry he want to strangle her then and there . But he reels it in knowing that if he hurt her he'd be just as bad as Sera and Harrit .

Taking a deep breath he close the gap between them and reach one hand out to grasp her shoulder gently .

Carrie feels warmth seep through her clothes into her shoulder and knows that he was touching her with his marked hand . The warmth was a bit warmer than average ,but it wasn't unbearable .

''Tell me if you need anything ,alright ?, come find me if you need to just talk or need something , it doesn't matter if it is at night , you know where my quarters are ,if I'm not there just ask around or send someone to fetch me ''.

His words sounds strangely urgent as if it is very important for her to listen to him .She didn't know if she should do that . Until lately he haven't even bothered talking to her much . Now it seems he had remembered that she was also there . Part of his team . And he couldn't shut up .

''Okay '', she says softly .

Nodding to her he squeezes her shoulder while smiling encouragingly , before he lowers his hand , stepping back .

''Well ,I should go now , got lots of things to do until I leave tomorrow for the Storm Coast again , news just got in that there were some bandits spotted there and they seem to be the same group that had terrorized The Hinterlands ''.

She said nothing while thinking of the list that she hadn't gone to look at because there wasn't any point to since she didn't get picked much to accompany the Inquisitor .

Frowning at her shabby looking gear , Carrie felt sorry for herself . Her mage armor and staff had seen better days . Even her pack looked like it'll break any second now .

''I can't use these '',she whines to herself ''I'll look like some beggar or urchin on a street corner.''

She sighs . She has no choice but to use them . She had no money . She should have had some , but it seemed when the others got paid , she had always been forgotten . Even Cole got paid .

Leaning down she picks up her armor . She'll go asks Harrit to help her fix it ,even if it is his fault that she got hurt earlier this day . If she was quick enough she might get to him before he leaves for his room at the tavern.

She finds him and the Inquisitor sifting through the old armor of the others .She could see Solas's armor on top of a pile . She bites her upper lip nervously when she spots the man of her dreams . He stood bending over a table oblivious of her standing just a few feet away .

Harrit who saw her just gave her a nasty look and ignored her further . She sighs softly at that and wishes that there was another black smith she could go to .

Taking a deep breath she walks towards them .

''Mm , Harrit , if you fix them properly ,you might get a fair price ….Oh, Hey Kiddo come to hand in your old armor ?'', he spoke . He looked at her questioningly ,holding out his hand towards the pile in her arms .

Stepping out of his hand's reach she shakes her head . ''No , Inquisitor , I err…I just came to ask Harrit if he could fix my armor for me '', she says trying to not look at him , but failing miserably because those eyes would always call for her to gaze into them .

''Do have coin ?'', Harrit asks a bit gruffly .

His question causes her shoulders to slump and with a shake of her head she turns away to leave .

''Kiddo , Wait !'', the Inquisitor calls after her ,trying to make her stay so he could talk to her .

Ignoring him she opens the door and steps out of the armory . Tears begun to pool in her eyes as her heart felt so hurt at having no money and not even being able to get her armor fixed . It spilled down her cheeks and made her eyes blurry as she rushed towards the door that'll take her to the safety of the rooms above the garden where her room was as well .

She nearly bumped into Solas on her way there . Even if her eyes was blurry she'd always know it's Solas because he had a certain aura to him .

''Be careful !'', he shouts .

Without looking up she whispers a soft ''Sorry '',before pushing past him . This day was one of the worse days she had experienced .

In the safety of her room she throws down her armor on the floor before falling down sobbing on her bed . She lets the tears fall freely as her body shook . Her heart was so broken . She don't know how long she cried ,but when her sobs finally subsided she just lay there on her bed wishing that tomorrow wouldn't come because tomorrow she'd be leaving with the Inquisitor for the Storm Coast . She heard it from Varric earlier ,who had been told by Josephine to come and tell her since she hadn't come to study the list .

''It was a last minute decision '', he had said . She didn't believe him . The Inquisitor always chose his team carefully . She had gone to look at the list anyway just to make sure .

Her surprise was great and she was giddy with happiness , but now she felt different about it .

A soft tired sigh escapes her lips . She didn't want to be part of the Inquisition anymore .It gave her more pain than the damn circle in Ostwick had ever .

Closing her eyes she decides to try and sleep . In the morning she'd go to Josephine and ask her if she could get a loan or something . She wasn't sure if one could ask Josephine that ,but she had to try . She would use that money to leave this wretched place . Or she could just let this go and stay here hoping that someone would remember her when new armor was handed out again .

Worn from crying she falls asleep almost instantly ,dreaming of better days . She didn't visit the Fade in her dreams tonight like most mages would be doing . She rather dreamed of better days for herself .

Maxwell stood on the battlements glaring unseeingly down at the refugee camp . He was deep in thought about the girl who had become something to him in such a short while . He didn't know what to do about the hurt he saw in those caramel eyes of her earlier today . He had wanted to scold Harrit for treating her like he did , but he didn't want anyone to think that he had feelings for the girl .

Clenching his fist he thought of how she had fled when he had called her back . He didn't understand why she didn't stay and talk to him . He lets out a deep sigh . Varric had told him of what had happened with Harrit and Sera , but Varric hadn't said why Harrit had made her stumble . Was he missing something important ?.

A frown creased his forehead as he thought of the way Harrit had asked if she had coin . Why didn't she have coin ?. Surely every party member got paid , even the mages .

''Inquisitor !'', a call from one of the guards on the battlements interrupts his thoughts . He sighed and turned to look at the man .

''What is it ?'',he asks politely .

''Commander Cullen needs your assistance ''.

''Oh , okay , thank you '', he says bowing his head slightly before walking off to find Cullen . He'll think of the girl another time.

She got dressed early and made her way towards an early breakfast put out for the team by the cooks . Varric was already there eating a steaming bowl of oatmeal .

Carrie who wasn't picky dished up some for herself and sat down next to her favorite dwarf .

''Morning , ''she yawns .

Varric just nods as his mouth is too full to talk . He eyes her up and down and she knows that he's taking in her shabby armor and chipping staff as well as her worn pack .

He looks dashing in his new Rogue armor . She knows that he got a new pack too . Everyone else did except for her . She envies him for having that luxury while she were still in rags .

Heavy footfalls from the direction of the throne tells her that the man she dreaded to see this morning was on his way . She followed the sound of every move he made as he dished up some food for himself .

''Morning , Varric , Kiddo '', he greeted as he sat down right next to her ,his body so near that his tight pressed against hers as well as his arm.

''Morning '', Varric says .

Carrie however don't know if she should speak up or not . She was afraid that she'll stutter if she does .

''I said morning ,Kiddo ,''he says again and he voice sounded a little bit sharp .

She turned her head to look at him and wish she hadn't because he stared at her, waiting for an answer .

She swallows, nearly choking on her mouth full of oatmeal . She starts coughing and gasping for breath and feels embarrassed when he slaps her on the back to help her .

''Be careful , Kiddo , you could have just motioned for me that your mouth is full !'', he scolds .

The sharpness of his voice brings tears to her eyes and without a word she gets up , grab her pack and rushes towards the door of the Great Hall .

''Kiddo ,Wait !'', he calls ''I didn't …oh , what's the use ''.

She ignores his words scampering towards the stables where eight horses stood saddled and ready for their long ride to the Storm Coast .Here she waited at the horse Master Dennett had pointed her to . She didn't look at them when they came walking to the stables half an hour later .

''Good morning , Kiddo '', Dorian greeted her yawning as he took the horse nearest to her .

''Morning '', she mumbles ,not looking at him .She knew what she'd see if she looked . Him clad in new mage armor .

The others didn't greet her . She didn't mind . She was used to it by now . The others didn't always talk to her much .

She took the rear when they started leading the horses towards the gate and struggled a little to mount her horse outside on the bridge . She ignored the feelings of electricity shooting throughout her body when two very familiar big hands lifted her into the saddle . One hand warmer than the other . She just mumbled a quiet ''Thank you ''as she settled into the saddle properly .

''You're welcome '', he says back before walking off to mount his most trusty steed Knight .

 **THIS IS MY FIRST ATTEMPT TO WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT DRAGONAGE INQUISITION . HOPE YOU LIKED IT .**


	2. Chapter 2

His Heart

Chapter 2

''What are you doing , Kiddo ?'', Varric asked .

They were sitting at the first camp on their way to the Storm Coast . They had ridden all day ,stopping only three times to let the horses rest . She hadn't spoken to them throughout the day . She only looked at them occasionally ,envying them their new attire and hating hers with each second .

She was freshly bathed ,having used a tent where clean , warm bathing water was readied for them by the three soldiers who guarded the camp .

The Inquisitor had given her first right to bathing . Not because she was the only girl there ,but because he wanted her out of that shabby armor that had been an eyesore for him the whole day. It was also an embarrassment for the Inquisition . She didn't know that and he didn't try to explain when he send her to bath .

She was now dressed in a green washed out tunic and leggings that had too many patches . That made him wonder if she had any other clothes that wasn't too worn .

''Drawing '', she says simply .

''Really ?, may I see?'', the dwarf asks sounding a bit too eager for her liking .

Looking up from her sketch book she shakes her head . ''No , it's private ''.

''Oh , come on , what could be so private that you'd hide it ?'', Varric whines .

The next thing she knows is a huge hand grabbing the sketch book out of her hands .

''Iron Bull !'', she exclaims ,jumping to her feet and bouncing up and down to try and take it back , but because he's so big she'll never really get it right .

Her eyes widens in horror as she watches him flip through it . Most of her sketches was of the Inquisitor and she knew that if she didn't stop Bull he'll reveal it to the man himself .

''Please , please , give it back !'', she wails , still bouncing up and down .She was desperate .

''Oh, let me see , Mmmm ,the Inquisitor , oooooh another one , oooooooh oh Inquisitor '', Bull says ignoring her pleas .

A soft sob escapes her lips as she tries harder to get back her book .

''Please , please !'', she begs frantically . To no avail .

''Oh Ho, Boss here's one of you without a shirt , wonder where she saw you , Mmm, someone has the hots for our Boss '', he goes on .

This causes her to feel dizzy with shame and embarrassment .Tears rolled like a stream down her cheeks as she still tried while pleading silently .With a last desperate attempt she shoots out a leg , kicking Bull on the shin of his left leg . It didn't work because her kick was too soft .

He ignored her as if she was a fly and nobody came to her rescue as he flipped through it further revealing her secret about drawing the Inquisitor mostly .

She stops bouncing and just stand there wishing for the world to swallow her up , while tears still streams down her cheeks . When Bull finally closes her book and holds it out to her to take she looks up at him , glaring at him viciously through her tears .

''May the Fade eat you up and spit you out in pieces '', she hisses before turning around storming to the tent she'd be sharing with one of the others while a shocked silence follows her .Nobody had expected that from this quiet girl .

Not even the man with the emerald eyes .

She lay down on her cot staring at the tent wall . She didn't know who she'd be sharing with and didn't care who it was , she just hoped it wasn't that stupid Quinari .

She couldn't sleep . She felt too emotional . _Nobody helped me ! ,_ she thinks _not even him ._

It hurt her that nobody even cared to help her . She felt so alone . Now more than ever .

He could have helped her . But he just sat there probably enjoying the show .

 _He'll never let anyone else get treated that way ,_ sadly she thinks _.Not his precious Cassandra or Vivienne or anyone for that matter , just me , I'm probably not worth his protection ._

Her stomach grumbles and for once she is glad that she wasn't outside by the fire where the others could hear it . She was hungry . In her hastiness to flee she had forgotten the Nug stew that the one guard had been preparing with the help of Varric.

She wasn't going to go out there now .She didn't want to face them just yet .

The tent flap opened suddenly and she lay still hoping that whoever it was would think that she was asleep .

She held her breath when the person halted at her cot . She had to steel herself not to bolt when a hand touches her hair ,gliding through the soft strands .

When the hand left her hair, trailing down her cheek she stiffened and bolted upright . She knew who it was the moment that hand touched her cheek and she wasn't surprised to look up into emerald eyes that shone brighter in the light of the lamps .

He stooped rather than stood , looking down at her with those eyes . He hadn't moved away when she bolted upright . He stayed there looking at her . He only moved his hand away .

''Don't be mad at Bull , you know how he is , he was just teasing you '', he murmurs .

She didn't say a word back just stared into his eyes .

Kneeling down as to not bend over like that anymore because it made him feel uncomfortable he reaches out that hand of him that'll always give him away to her , taking one of her hands he looks at her in an urgent way .

''Please , forgive , Bull, he didn't mean to embarrass you like that '', he pleads softly .

Looking down at their hands she wishes with all her heart that he touched her hand because he wanted to be with her ,not to plead on that big oaf's behalf .

''Kiddo,...if you forgive him I'll be grateful and I just might give you a kiss , if you want that, you'd like that won't you ? ''.

She stared in wonder as his hand begun to glow slightly . She looked up at him her eyes wide and so beautiful it made his heart rate increase .That scared him, So he pulled his hand back and got up ,backing away from her .

''Erm ,dinner is ready if you want some '', he says in that toneless voice hat hid his emotions well . Inside he actually felt a bit uncomfortable because of the way she made his body and heart react to her .

''I'm not hungry '', she finally speaks her voice full of emotion .

He nods . ''Suit yourself '', he says , then leaves .

Later Cole comes in an lays down on the other cot . He didn't even look at her .

She didn't speak to anyone when she woke up the next day . She retrieved her sketch book from the requisitions table and vowed never to draw the Inquisitor again . She ate her breakfast consisting of oatmeal and a cup of milk in silence as she ignored the looks that they threw at her .

Her armor looked far more worn today as it did the previous day and that made Maxwell feel far more embarrassed than the day before .

''Don't you have anything better to wear ?'', he blurts unthinkingly when they get ready to depart from the camp .

For a moment she freezes while feeling all the blood drain from her face . She didn't know if she should answer him or not . What could she say ?. 'Sorry ,Inquisitor , I didn't get shiny new armor like you lot ,so I have to make do with what I got '. Yeah , that won't help . Not one bit .

Instead she opts to say nothing and he doesn't ask again which is a huge relieve to her .

The ride to the next camp is done in silence . Well , except for Bull's occasional attempt to get her attention by making kissy noises and saying words like ''Oh , Inquisitor , why don't you stick mister big man inside me , Oh ''.

She tried ignoring that as much as she can ,but the more he said things like that the more she felt embarrassed ,later to the point of tears . And once again no one comes to her aid .

When they halt for lunch she finds a spot to sit far away from the others while she contemplates on how she was going to get away from the Inquisition . She couldn't take all the jabs and teasing anymore . Nor the way that nobody helped her when Bull starts with his jokes , or the way she was treated differently like not getting new armor like the others .

She ate her portion of lunch in silence unaware that the Inquisitor occasionally sneaked a glance at her . He felt his heart constrict at her obvious sadness and loneliness .

He knew that it was his fault . Well not all of it , but some of it was .He had decided on her coming with him without thinking it through first . He let Bull treat her like he did without intervening .He even felt embarrassed to be seen with her because of her armor .

She finished her meal and got up to walk towards her horse . She didn't look at the others as she started caressing and playing with her horse . She so loved this sweet dappled grey stallion with his gentle nature .

She smiled when he started playfully nibbling on her hair .''Stop'', she giggles as she tries to push him away .

From where they can hear it Varric smiles at her obvious childish happiness at the simple thing such as a horse nibbling on you .

''It's like she is completely another person '', Dorian says gaping at her .

''Or maybe she hopes that that'll turn on the Boss '', Bull says earning a glare from not just Maxwell but also Varric who had just about enough of Bull's teasing for one day .

''I'm not turned on , Bull '', Maxwell says coldly ''I don't have time for silly sexual games ''.

He lied because the scene in front of him caused something primitive to stir inside of him . Something he wasn't ready to accept inside his heart . At that very moment he wanted to walk towards her and kiss her . He didn't give into that because he didn't want anyone to know how he feels about her .

She took up the rear again when they moved on . Her horse trotted just behind Varric's . She wasn't all that surprised when the dwarf pulled his horse back after a while to trot alongside hers .

''You should talk ,Kiddo , not be so silent '', he says trying to make conversation .

''I don't want to '', she says .

''But you have to , see the Inquisitor won't mind if you talk , I think he feels sorry for you about Bull's behavior ''.

''I don't have to and I don't need his pity '', she says feeling rather hurt at those words .

Varric sighs and shakes his head . ''At least he didn't scold you for drawing him , I could see he wasn't happy about it when Bull announced it to the whole camp , you shouldn't have drawn him without his permission''.

Feeling her heart get a few more holes she looks at Varric with hurt clearly written on her face .

''Don't worry I won't do it again , for all I care you all can just go drown yourselves in the sea'', she says her voice thick .

With that said she urges her horse forward to gallop past the others while fresh tears blurred her vision .

The last camp before they'd reach the Storm Coast held only two soldiers . A man and a woman . One a scout and the other a warrior .

The woman took Carrie to a tent to bath before dinner and stayed with her chatting about everything she could think of under the sun.

She didn't mind that the woman kept her company even if she didn't answer much . When she was clean ,she dressed in a pink tunic that had a patch on her hip and one breast and white leggings that had seen far better days . The woman stared at her clothes in a way that made Carrie's face flush red in embarrassment .

When she walks out of the tent she sees the Inquisitor sitting alone at the fire . He was already clean and dressed in a white shirt and black pants . They were in the same fashion as his usual clothes ,that he wore at Skyhold .

She felt her heart rate rise at seeing how sexy he looked in those clothes . It beat so loud in her ears that she was afraid that he'd hear it too .

A hand pushed her out of the way and she stumbled slightly . It was the woman soldier . She was on her way to the Inquisitor . Carrie felt disgust when the woman started flirting with him and hurt when he flirted back . She knew then that tonight he'd easily share his bed with that woman . She wasn't naïve . She knew the Inquisitor was a very sexually active man . She'd heard some of the maids at Skyhold whisper about his escapades . He was obviously not a saint .

She sighed in disappointment as she saw how he reached out to grope the woman's tight ,while smiling seductively . Not wanting to see more of this she found herself walking off into the darkness away from the camp as a sad feeling nestled in her chest . Of course . She wasn't good enough to be flirted with .

She found a rock on a sort of hill to sit on where she could stare down into a small valley where Bronto's

Tears spilled down her cheeks as she thought of how she was always the one who'd be left out . She wanted more from life than being a simple mage . In her heart that unanswered love filled her as she thought of the Inquisitor who never really talk to her much . An Inquisitor who seems to be embarrassed at being seen with her because of her clothes .

Pulling her knees to her chest , she leans her head on them as the solitariness of darkness wraps around her .

''Why did I survive that day ?'', she asks herself for the millionth time since she had woken up after the explosion .

''Maybe because you still have a duty in life '', a very familiar quiet voice comes from under a tree not far from where she sat . Solas . The elven apostate .

She looked up and saw only his outline where he stood .

''What duty ?'', she says ,her voice bitter ''my life is worthless , I'm out of the circle yet I still get treated like a blight on society , what does a man in shiny new armor knows about a girl in rags life? , I tell you , _nothing ,_ so don't make me laugh ''.

That causes him to walk out from under the tree towards her .Perching on the rock beside her he says ''I know more than you think , Kiddo , and I am sorry if you got hurt the other day , if I knew you needed better armor I would have given you my old ones , they were in far better shape than yours and would have fit you well ''.

She didn't look at him . She didn't want to see those silvery eyes of him shine in the moonlight or see that look of pity he sometimes donned like a mask . She knew how friendly he could be . And she knew how heartless . She didn't need to look at him to know any of that .

''You should tell him that you need new armor '', Solas continues after a few moments of silence . ''He won't bite ,you know , he'll rather try and help you ''.

She didn't comment on that . What was there to say . She knew that he'd only pity her and she needed more from him than pity . She needed his love .That was something out of her reach and she knew it .

Getting off from the rock she turns to look at Solas ''You're wrong , he won't help me , because I am nothing to him , he'd be more likely to help you or one of the others , I'm just a nobody , just a simple mage who happened to survive the explosion ''.

With that she walks back to camp to find the Inquisitor eating his dinner without Bull or any of the other . She walked past him towards the tent she'd be sharing with that woman if the woman didn't go to the Inquisitor later that night .

She pulled off her leggings and laid down on her cot . For a few moments longer she thought of Solas's words and what she had said to him .

Her words were the truth . She was nothing to the Inquisitor . Nothing at all .

She awoke in the small hours of the morning feeling cold . A cold breeze blew over her face and she realized that she wasn't inside the tent anymore .

For a moment she wondered if she had sleep walked there ,but then she remembers that she never sleep walks and the fact that all her things laid next to her in the dirt told her that she wasn't about to do that anytime soon .

She decides to get up since she had nowhere to sleep further now . She shivered as she realizes that she still only wore her tunic , leaving her legs bare . Looking through her things she find her leggings ,but realizes that she won't be able to wear them anymore . Someone had cut them up in several places . She had an inkling who it was even if she couldn't prove it .

She went into the bushes to don her mage armor ,struggling in the dark with the straps .She wondered as she checked through her things why the one who had thrown her out of the tent ,had only cut her leggings .

She was surprised to see the Inquisitor coming out of another tent with Varric which ruled him out as an accomplice because at the back of her mind a voice had told her that maybe he had helped the woman because he wanted some alone time with her .

''Morning , Kiddo '', he says yawning and stretching .

Swallowing her pride for once and not just stare at him like an idiot she says ''Morning , Inquisitor '', without even stuttering ,earning a surprised look from him . For good measure she plasters on a smile . It's a smile that momentarily takes his breath away . Only momentarily because Varric takes his attention away from her .

''So why didn't you take Recruit Ellen to our tent last night ?, you know I could have crashed with Kiddo until you and Ellen were finished '' .

This news surprises Carrie more . Why didn't he?.

''I'm sorry ,Varric , you won't have been able to crash with me because I slept outside '', she blurts unthinkingly .

He and the Inquisitor turns to look at her , stunned .

''What do you mean you slept outside?'', The Inquisitor asks '', I know you actually went inside , I saw you ''.

Swallowing she says ''I ..eh ..was in the tent to begin with ,but I woke up outside and whats more is my leggings were cut into rags and my pack was outside too ''.

The Inquisitor stares at her frowning while Varric just gapes .

''Are you sure you didn't just walk in your sleep ?, and maybe you could have torn your leggings when you took them off ?''.

The Inquisitor sounded not in the least bit worried about what had happened to her . His voice dripped with accusation .

''No , I don't sleepwalk , and my leggings were fine when I took them off '', she tries to assure him ,but he shakes his head leaving no doubt in her mind that he didn't believe her .

''Kiddo , don't make up stories ,okay ?, if you want attention you could surely do better than that '', he said in a stern fatherly voice before turning to stoke the fire so he could cook water for tea .

Standing there with her eyes on his back she wishes that she had just kept her mouth shut . She knew he wouldn't ever listen to her . She was nothing to him and it was time she should remember that .

''It's true then '', she says without knowing that she was saying it out loud ''Solas was wrong and I was right , he'd never help me or listen to me , he'd rather help others because even if I am part of his team ,I'm nothing to him ''.

Turning away from the fire and the two people she walks off to the horses unaware that her words had shocked both . Varric because he didn't know that she felt that way and Maxwell because he never knew that her words could hurt him so badly . Did he fail her ?. Why didn't she talk to him ?. Is it because he comes off us someone unapproachable ?. He didn't know the answers to that . He sure wanted to know it because then he'd be able to understand her .

She swung her staff left ,letting loose a burst of fire at another mage bandit . Her body moved fluently with the strange dance she was dancing as she fought .

There was no music . Nothing ,but she danced anyway .

Maxwell had to steel himself from letting his eyes wander to her . Her movements was mesmerizing and oh so sexy it made him hard . To be hard on the battlefield was not the best idea ,but he couldn't control his body . He wanted her . He knew that . He wanted to just rip that ridiculous worn armor from her and fuck her so hard that she'll only know his name and scream it out to the world as she came . He shook his head hoping to clear his mind of the picture that formed in his mind about them having sex . That was not going to happen .Not now while she didn't trust him and he didn't want to give anyone the notion that he actually liked her .

She was unaware of how her body turned on the Inquisitor while she twirled her staff in one hand and lighting up a spell in the other . Slamming the staff down on the ground she channeled that same spell through it and when she lifted her staff the spell burst through the staff's crystal point towards the bandit .

It was when she twirled it again and slammed it against the ground again that it suddenly splintered , breaking in half . She stared shocked at her staff and didn't notice when another bandit ran towards her with his sword raised to finish her off while she was distracted .

He didn't go that far because he had to pass the Inquisitor who had seen his plan . With a powerful swing from the man with the glowing hand the bandit got cut in half .

''Kiddo ,stop staring at your broken staff and get out of here ! '', he barks .

Carrie is still too shocked to hear him as she stares at her staff's remnants . Luckily for her only one more bandit is left and with a group effort from the others he is dealt with easily .

With all the bandits gone the Inquisitor walks towards her with a furious scowl on his face .

Clamping down a hand on her one arm he starts shaking her while screaming at her .

''What in Maker's name are you doing not listening to me when I tell you to get out of here !''.

Teeth rattling and body numb with shock ,she can do nothing but stare at him . ''What were you thinking ?, standing here where you were the damn perfect target ?!, you stupid ,stupid girl ''. With that said he does something that no one ever expected from him . He slams his lips against hers, kissing her roughly .

For a moment she's as stiff as a wall before she relaxes , kissing him back .

The world stops spinning as they forget that they aren't alone . It's just him and her on an island of passion . Drowning in a sea of emotions . The kiss turns gentler as all the anger and frustration seeps out of him . She feels it when he is no longer furious ,but her mind is too deeply buried inside a bog of feelings that she can't think straight . He deepens the kiss ,hungering for more than just kissing her soft kissable lips . Pressing his tongue against her lower lip he tries to coax her into letting him in and he isn't disappointed when she parts her lips so that he could plunge his tongue inside . Without hesitation her tongue meets his in a dance .

When he finally lifts his head they are both breathless . Taking a deep breath he presses his forehead to hers while holding her securely to him . She let him hold her as she gazed up into his eyes . Her eyes were bright with passion that told him that if he had asked her she'd have gone to bed with him right now .

Someone clearing their throat behind them breaks the spell that wove itself around them . Closing his eyes for a second or two he sighs . Then he opens his eyes , give her one last peck on the lips before letting her go , stepping back a few steps and turning to glare at the others ,especially Bull .

''Do not say a word '', he warns before walking pass them . They don't . They just fall into step with him .

Carrie watch him leave , her broken staff lying at her feet , forgotten . A second later she lets out a squeal of delight causing him to smile as he walks onward towards the Inquisition camp that wasn't far from where the bandits had been .

Freshly bathed Carrie finds herself in the same camp with that woman Ellen a couple of days later . She wasn't happy to see her even if she couldn't change the fact that they needed to stop there for the night.

The kiss didn't bring much change between her and the Inquisitor . He hadn't spoken to her much since that day , just greeted her as usual in the mornings with his usual ''Morning , Kiddo ''. What did change was the way he smiled at he or looked at her . It was full of an emotion she couldn't understand and she didn't think it was love because she was afraid to read him wrong .

She sat under a makeshift roof made of a tent sail since it was raining and they needed to stay dry . She was reading a book that she had brought along for when they didn't fight . Not that she could fight because her staff was still broken and she had no spare except maybe the low leveled staff of the bandit mage which Solas had picked up for her .

It didn't do much damage and it was on its last legs too .

''Oh , Inquisitor , have you finished bathing , you should have called me to scrub your back '', she heard that insufferable woman trying to flirt again . She didn't know why the woman even bothered . The Inquisitor clearly didn't want her tonight .

She hid a smug smile when the Inquisitor answers in a toneless voice that he are quite capable of scrubbing his own back .

She decides to sneak a peek at him and almost let her book fall in surprise because he stood only an arm length away looking straight at her .

She could do nothing ,but look back at him . He had a seductive smirk on his lips that made him irresistibly sexy and his eyes were dark with that emotion again . She felt her cheeks heat up in a blush and she felt suddenly very shy .

When he slowly closed the distance between them she didn't expect him to squat down in front of her and take her hands in his .

She was so engrossed in his actions that she didn't mind that her book fell on the ground .

When he spoke it was like a spell had been cast on her . ''Hey ,Kiddo ''. It was simple , yet sounded like something extraordinary .

She stared into his eyes , getting lost in them like the day he had caught her when she almost fell .

''Want to take a walk with me ?'', he asks as he shifts one of her hands to his hand that held the other ,leaving his hand free to touch her cheek .

She'd go into the Fade and back with him if he asked so she nodded , unable to say a word .

Getting to his feet he pulls her up with him and leads her away into the darkness while rain still pours over the land .

He doesn't talk until they find a dry spot under an overhanging rock . Without wasting more time he pulls her into his arms , pressing his lips against hers for their second kiss that tasted sweeter than the first .

This time his hands trails over every part of her body , discovering it , committing the feel of her to memory .

She does the same as she feels a little bit of boldness take lead of her . She touches his chest , feeling it through the tight shirt . She touches his stomach and even his straining manhood .

He gasped against her lips when her hand touched him there causing his desire to make her his rise sky-high .

Without warning he cups her butt pulling her up against him while he starts grinding against her . She felt something wet pool between her legs and knew that without a doubt she wanted him to take her right then and there .

But they don't give into their desires that easily . Now wasn't the time for wanting to have sex . He didn't want their first time together to be in a place like that . He wanted her inside his bed in Skyhold where it was clean and clearly not raining . So , he lifted his head and took a deep breath while hugging her tightly .

She stood with her head against his chest , wondering why he stopped . She wanted him and she knew without any doubts that he wanted her too . Or was she mistaken ?.

When he pulled back a bit she wasn't sure what to think when he cupped her chin , lifting it so that he could look into her eyes , even though he won't be able to see much because the moon was hidden behind clouds . She did see his eyes though because he lit up his marked hand a little so that he could see her .

''We'll do this another time alright ?'', he says gently .''I don't want us to rush into things like two hormonal teenagers , it should be something special and enjoyable ''.

His words washed away all her fears . He really wanted her and she was willing to wait until the day he made her his .

''I'm not saying that we should go back to camp right now , we can stay here and talk for a bit if you want ''.

She nods ''Okay , what do we talk about ?''.

''Well, anything you want to , let's see ,Hmm , how old are you ,Kiddo ?''.

''Twenty , you?''.

He smiles ''Twenty four , in which circle were you ?''.

''Really were going to play twenty questions ?, '' she asks and when he nods she continues ''Ostwick Circle ''.

''Seriously ?, how come I never saw you with the other mages when they were out and about ?''.

''I did go out , but I never really mingled with any other people , my friend Elana was the outgoing type , me , I was happy to sit in a corner and watch as people walked by ''.

''Do you remember much of your time there ?''.

She shook her head ''No, some of my memory got lost when the Breach caused the explosion , Solas had said that it might take some time , Elana died in the explosion ''.

''I'm sorry '', he says sadly .

She shook her head ''Not ,your fault , Inquisitor , you didn't cause the explosion , I'm sure ''.

He nods and smiles then asks ''All of us calls you Kiddo , I don't think that , that is your name so what is your real name ?''.

''Carrie Snow ''.

He stiffens as he suddenly remembers something ,by hearing her name .A man called Martin Snow used to work for his father on one of his estates in the country side . He wonders now if Carrie was related to him .He had only one way to find out .

''That's a nice name , is it just Carrie or is your name longer ?''.

''Carrie is the only name I have , Mama wanted her daughters to not have too long names like the nobles , Papa gave me my name ''.

''What is his name ?''.

''Papa ?, well, his name is Martin and Mama is Pippa ''.

He stiffens at hearing that . So she wasn't a lady like Josephine believed . She was a damn commoner and he kissed her and still wanted her . Oh , what a damn mess .

''My father has a Martin Snow working for him on his estate near a village named after my uncle Jarvis , is there a chance that it could be your father ?''.

She shifted in her seat . At some point they had sat down on the floor .

''Do you mean the Village of Jarvis ?, I lived there before I was taken to the circle ,I don't know who my father works for , but we could write and ask ''. Some thought strikes her then like all nasty thoughts does causing her shoulders to slump .

''You won't want me anymore if my father is that Martin Snow '', she says sadly .

Reaching out his hand he grabs hers . ''No , Kiddo , here we both are free to choose , I've become my own person and you did too , don't let those things ruin what we have right now ''.

His voice sounded so gentle as if he was talking to a fragile person .

''Okay '', she says .

He smiles and gets up ,pulling her with him .''Let's go before Bull comes looking for us and you know him he'll probably think we did more than just kiss ''.

She blushed at those words . She was so very glad that the darkness hid her face .

I KNOW THERES A LOT OF LOVEY DOVEY KISSING AND SADNESS BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED !


	3. Chapter 3

His Heart

Chapter 3

''Hey ,Kiddo , could you please take this letter to Josephine?''.

''Sure , Commander , I'll go right away ''.

They were back in Skyhold for three weeks now . The Inquisitor hadn't spoken to her again after that night and he hadn't acted differently towards her either . She knew he was busy ,but he could find time for them .She hoped that what they had wasn't some dream .

She had written to her parents ,but haven't received any word back yet . She didn't know if they'll write back or not .She hadn't seen them for many years . She didn't even know if they remembered that they had another daughter .She couldn't remember much about them either .She couldn't blame them if they forgot about her .

Josephine wasn't alone when she arrived there . The Inquisitor stood reading a letter and he didn't even notice her when she pushed past him to hand Josephine the letter from Cullen . She wondered what was in the letter he was reading , but didn't want to bother him so she didn't ask .

''Thank you , Kiddo , have you heard anything back yet ?, ''Josephine asks in her usual friendly manner .

She took her eyes from the Inquisitor's profile to look at the ambassador and didn't know that he finally became aware that she was within arm's reach from him and he didn't even know .

''No , I'm not sure if they even would write back , Lady Josephine '', she says unaware that he stared at her now .

''I'm sure they will , have faith anyhow would you take these reports to Leliana ?, she had been breathing down my neck since yesterday ''.

When she reaches out to take it she almost jumps in fright when a very familiar glowing hand reaches out to snatch it away . She turns her head to look at an Inquisitor with a mischievous look on his face .

''I'll take them to Leliana , you can simply accompany me ,Kiddo '', he says winking at her naughtily .

For a moment she's too stunned to do anything ,but then she gives him a half smile while shaking her head .

He surprises her by taking her hand as they walk towards the door . She had to be deaf if she didn't hear the soft gasp from Josephine . And hear it she did . She had to smile about that because she wasn't even sure that he'll even show affection like this in front of other people , though he did kiss her in front of some of the inner circle .

She looked up at him and saw him smile at her . She blushes and smile back before looking away .

She stood on the same spot she stood a few weeks ago ,staring at the refugee camp that had miraculously grown since her last time standing there .

She wasn't angry this time . She wasn't happy either . A letter had come from her parents . They wanted nothing to do with her . Leliana had given her the letter when she and the Inquisitor had gone to her to give her the reports . She had opened the sealed envelope immediately . She had read it while the Inquisitor had talked to Leliana for a bit . Her parents ,especially her mother had said to never write to them again because she was a mage ,she wasn't their child anymore . She was a blight on society . She had thrown down the letter and had ran here while feeling her heart break with every step she took .

She sniffs feeling as if she'll never be good enough for anyone . Not even the Inquisitor . Even if he did kiss her and such , it didn't mean he'll suddenly really , truly be hers ,or as she sees it care enough to want to be with her .

She didn't hear the man of her heart approach ,so deep in thought was she .Only when he spoke from beside her did she become aware of him .

''Are you ,okay , Kiddo?'', he asks , his voice gentle and soothing .

She doesn't turn to look at him ,just shrugged trying to act indifferent , but he saw more than she thought . The sadness , the anger and the disappointment .

Reaching out he touches her shoulder gently as if she was breakable .

''Kiddo , if you need anything just tell me so I can help you '', he says softly .

She nods ,but keep staring at the refugee camp below .

''I know it's private ,but I read the letter since you threw it away , did your parents always thought that way about you ?''.

She stood there wondering what to say . She felt so embarrassed about him knowing what her parents thought of her and while she thought of that, a long forgotten memory appeared in her mind when she was but a sixteen year old mage in Ostwick Circle .

It had been one of those days when she had been allowed to go out . Elana had accompanied her as she had been tasked to man the stall that one of the older mages had set up in the market . They stayed there minding their own business when a young Templar and a young richly dressed man had paused at the stall .

The Templar had been one of the vicious ones . He had picked up a bottle of potion and had dropped it while he had looked at her and Elana with a huge vicious smirk on his face . The young noble had snickered while the Templar had picked up another bottle , dropping it like the other one .

They had watched helplessly as the bottles fell , shattering on the cobble stones of the market square . They couldn't do a thing because , Knight Captain Ross had the upper hand of authority .

More bottles followed the first two and all the while the damn noble snickered . Carrie remembers looking at him and wishing she could do something to wipe off any glee from that handsome face of his . That noble had emerald eyes . That noble was the man standing beside her .

She slowly returns to reality as the memory fades back into her mind and as she looks up into those emerald eyes she feels far worse than she had about her parents . She was in love with a man who had been cruel towards mages in the past .

She didn't know how she found her way to her room or when she had left him there on the battlements . All she knew was that she was sprawled out on her bed as her whole world broke into little pieces .

More memories washed over her . Like when she found Elana bloodied and naked in a corner of the courtyard of the Circle Tower one evening and had learned soon after that three Templars had raped her . She also remembered the time when she almost got raped herself. If it wasn't for the First Enchanter who arrived at the right time she would have been soiled and damaged .

She couldn't phantom how she could fall in love with a man who was friends with that Templar .

A knock on her door causes her to sit up . _Not again !,_ she screams inside her head because she had an inkling who it might be . She was so used to this by now . Her storming off and he following after a while .

Sure enough the Inquisitor's deep sexy voice called through the closed door ''Kiddo, I know you're in there !, open the door ,now !''.

With a soft shuddering sigh she got up and walked over to the door .

She forced herself to look at him as she opened the door .

His face was full of some kind of emotion as he stood there in front of her .

''Mind if I come in for a bit ?'', he asks .

She stood aside automatically , letting him in .

She closed the door and turned to him . He stood staring at her with his head inclined . There was an unreadable question in his eyes .She couldn't answer it even if she knew what the question was .

''Are you Okay?'', he asks even though the question wasn't something that he should have bothered asking .

She shakes her head . Honesty was her strong point and she wasn't about to lie to him .

''Is it something I did or said ?, see I know it has nothing to do with your parents letter , I could see the moment you changed , Kiddo , it was like you became distant ''.

Folding her arms around herself to keep herself from falling apart she asks ''Do you remember a Knight Captain Ross ?''.

She sees him stiffen as the name registers in his brain .

''You mean my cousin from mother's side ?'', he counters .

She didn't know about that but nodded anyway .

''What about him ?'', he asks .

''I saw you once with him when I was sixteen , he was breaking potion bottles at a stall my friend and I was tending to and _you_ snickered as bottle after bottle fell and broke ''.

Her words hit him hard . She could see that by the way his eyes widened . By the way his mouth opened as if he wanted to say something about it that would make it right .

''I saw you other times too , with other people , I saw you mistreat a young mage boy once , pushing him into the dirt , stepping on his hand , calling him a dirty abomination and a blight on society ''.

Her voice was toneless , but it hit him anyway, making him stare at her with a painfully shocked look in his eyes .

''I should have remembered you before … well before us happened , don't get me wrong , I'm not holding anything against you , Inquisitor , I just don't understand how someone so cruel could turn out to be such a good person , a fox can change color ,but not from fur , what happened that you turned into the person that you are now ?''.

He stare at her still . His eyes dark with emotion .

He would owe her an answer because he had none that would suffice .

''I have to go '', he says his voice thick with emotion and before she can stop him he leaves ,slamming the door behind him so hard that the walls shudders .

She looked at the closed door wishing that she had kept her mouth shut . She was slowly beginning to sift through the past , but kept an open mind that sooner or later she'd have to move on from it and decide if she still wanted to be part of him and his life . She'd have to forgive him then and forget the past that seemed to bother and hurt him now .

Maxwell Trevelyan paced the length of his quarters as his thoughts turned to his past .

He knew somehow that one day his cruel ways of the past would be remembered . He just didn't imagine that it would be by the woman he had feelings for .

He knew when the change in his ways came . He had been twenty one . He was ready to marry the love of his life Sabrina when his father informed him that Sabrina was betrothed to his brother Raymond and that he himself was going to be send away to become a Chantry Cleric .

He didn't want to . He argued with his father . He wanted to be a Templar like his cousin Ross . It was no use . Even if he had been trained by the best teachers in Sword fighting since he could walk , his father kept being adamant that he was going to join the Chantry .

He was angry at everyone in his life and had started hanging out with the poorer folk of the city , hoping to find something better in his existence , seeking what he couldn't find . Instead some of the good people's generous ways in sharing and caring even if they had little to spare shaped him into the man that started feeling for others . Turning him back into the person he was when he was still a boy .

Footsteps climbing the stairs to his quarters causes him to pause and stare at the stairs .A few seconds later a very familiar bald headed elf appears at the top .

''Inquisitor , I don't know if you're busy , but I have something to talk to you about '', he says falling with the door in the house so to speak .

''Alright , '' Maxwell says eager to do something rather than wallow in his past .

''It's about Kiddo and her having no armor that is suitable for her , and because she isn't getting paid like the rest of us for some reason , I told her to talk to you about it ,but she refused and I've been thinking of it ever since , Inquisitor , so today I decided to come talk to you myself since we'll be leaving in a few days and she'll be coming with us ''.

Maxwell stares at the elf who he never thought could feel so much empathy for a girl like Kiddo .

''Is she aware that you came to me ?'', he asks .

Solas shakes his head . ''No , I don't think that she'll appreciate it , Inquisitor , she's very stubborn and since you and her are together it's time I talk to you about all her problems ''.

''And you think I can solve them ?, I'll try but she isn't happy with me today , she remembered something about her past and it turns out she knew something about me that she didn't like ''.

''Maybe if you help she'll forgive and forget ''.

Maxwell shrugs ''Maybe '', he mutters unconvinced .

''Do what you can to help her, Inquisitor , and you'll see she will be your precious girl again ''.

Carrie shoved the spoon of green beans into her mouth , chewing a bit long toothed . She hated green beans . Sometimes it was all she had to eat when she was in the Circle .

At least her plate had more than just green beans on it .

Someone sitting down next to her groaned in disgust . By the smell of the person she could tell who it was . Sera who always smelled sour . Like sour turned mustard .

''Isn't it nice , all these food an' we don' have to work for it ?'', the smelly blond haired skinny elf asks .

Giving her an incredulous look Carrie wonders how Sera could think of food while she smells like a pot of sour Mustard .

''I guess '', she says trying not to antagonize the elf . She had too much on her plate right now to add an angry Sera to the list .

''Mmm , Yummy , green beans '', Sera says shoving some into her mouth .

She felt like gagging when Sera ate like a pig .Food flew everywhere mixed with her spit , some of it landing in Carrie's plate .

A groan of disgust slips over Carrie's lips . Really Sera had no table manners whatsoever .

Discarding her plate she stares at Sera wishing the elf wouldn't eat with her . She has lost her apatite now .

After a moment she can't take it anymore so she gets up to walk away . A snort of laughter taunts her until she is out of hearing range . Sera must have planned this . She was so mean .Carrie hated her for that .

She looked at Blackwall laboring over making a rocking wooden horse .

He had put himself on that task and he made it look so easy as he worked .

''It looks great '', she compliments from her seat on a table that had seen better days . She had to sit very still to keep it from breaking .

''Thank You , Kiddo, ''Blackwall says smiling .

The sound of footsteps coming in their direction makes both of them look up just to see their Inquisitor approaching with long easy strides .

''Hey, how's it going ?'', he greets them with a smile plastered on his lips .

It's been two days now and this is the first time she sees him up close . He look more handsome than ever . That much she couldn't deny herself to notice .

His eyes darted to her now and as emerald eyes met caramel eyes the golden strings between their hearts tightened even more .

She had time to get over the thoughts of the past these two days , now she was ready to move on from it as she knew that he wasn't that young idiot of a cruel noble anymore .

As her lips twitched into a soft smile Maxwell knew instantly as if she had told him that she wasn't mad at him anymore and that makes his heart swell with an indescribable feeling . He smiles back at her and have to suppress a chuckle when she blushes . She was still so innocent and he looked forward to showing her how to become a woman in every sense , even in bed .

''Fine , I'm just still busy with this horse , I had made four so far '', Blackwall interrupts their little moment.

''That's good to hear , at least there would be something for the little ones to be happy about '', Maxwell says shifting his gaze away from his beloved Kiddo to the bearded man while he holds out his hand to Kiddo .

Carrie found herself getting off the table and moving towards him to place her hand in his . His hand was warm and it somehow glowed around hers making it seem as if they both had glowing hands .She looked in awe at that forgetting that he stood there next to her and that Blackwall was with them .

''Yes , Inquisitor , the children has lost so much in this war ,anyway so are you taking Dorian with you to the Exalted Plains ?, he said that he had some Venatori to get rid of there ''.

''I don't know , maybe , anyway I have to go now , talk to you later again ,Blackwall''.

Carrie didn't protest when he pulled her with him as he walked away .She rather tried walking faster to match his longer strides .

She was a bit surprised when he halted at a market stall that sold weapons and other useable trinkets , like amulets that enhanced magic and such .

'' Can I see your best staffs please ?'', Maxwell asks the masked lady with the large hat that manned the stall .

''Of course , Inquisitor,'' the woman says smiling at him while she ignores Carrie completely .

Carrie frowns at that and wonders why the Inquisitor wanted to see the staffs .

There was only four staffs that was higher leveled than her old one and they were very expensive . She eyed them wistfully when the woman laid them out in front of the Inquisitor who immediately let go of her hand ,picking one up to examine .

''This one looks nice , what kind is it ?''.

''It's an ice and lightning staff ,Inquisitor , it's got a rune that has a fifty percent chance to critically damage demons and dragons ''.

'' That sounds great but I need the best one ,which one is the highest level ?''.

''The one in your hand is , Inquisitor ''.

Maxwell nods before asking what the price is . Carrie had to suppress a gasp at hearing that it costs more than twelve thousand gold . She was even more shocked when the Inquisitor told the lady that he'll take it as if he was talking about the weather .

Her eyes widens when he holds the staff out for her to take .

''I believe this is now yours '', he drawls nonchalantly.

She backs up a little eyeing the staff as if it'll bite her . ''I can't accept it , Inquisitor !'', she protests .

He shakes his head as his eyes darken slightly in anger . ''Kiddo , just take it , see it as compensation for everything that happened to you in the Inquisition , besides your staff is broken , you need a new one and Harrit didn't want to smith more staffs , I asked him to , but he refused ''.

With that said he steps towards her , takes her hand and press the staff into it making sure to close her fingers around it .

For a moment she's quiet as she stands there in front of him , eyeing the staff , feeling it's smooth surface in her hand . Then remembering her manners she steps on her tiptoes , reach up to cup his cheek with her free hand , pulling his head down to hers and kiss him quickly on his lips before letting her hand fall away from his cheek and stepping back .

''Thank You '', she says .

He watches her for a moment stunned at what just happened before snapping out of it , giving her a brief smile in acknowledgement .

Solas was right it seems , she did forgive him .He must thank him for that advice later when he sees him.

She stared at the almost navy blue and silver armor that a servant had delivered to her .

It was breathtakingly beautiful with the Inquisition emblem carved out on the left breastplate .It had long snug fitting sleeves made of some rich blue fabric . The upper part was made of silver colored metal and the same fabric as the sleeves .A hood hung from the collar also made of the same fabric . The lower part fanned out hanging loosely . With the upper armor came tights and knee high boots that was just her size .

She didn't know if she was dreaming as she looked at it . She knew that the Inquisitor had send it to her with the servant because the servant had told her who had sent her . She wasn't sure what had gotten into the Inquisitor to give her gifts . First the new staff now this new mages armor .

She bites her lower lip wondering if she should go thank him ,or if she should leave it until he and she meets face to face again when they leave for the Exalted Plain in the morning .

A knock on the door a few minutes later and the same servant delivers some clothes that makes her eyes widen at seeing it . One of the clothes is a thin nightdress that'll never be worn by her if she could help it because it is somewhat see-through. The underclothes causes her to blush because it is made of delicate lace and silks . No , she won't be wearing them anytime soon .

The other clothes are made up of tunics , leggings and a couple of dresses .

''Oh ,no no more '', she groans when a little bit later she receives shoes and boots to go with the clothes .

She's busy packing most of it away when the Inquisitor appears at her door smiling broadly .

''Do you like them ?'', he asks immediately .

She blushes as she nods . He chuckles at seeing the blush causing her try and hide her face behind one of the tunics .

Stepping into the room he looks around before looking back at her .

''Can I get a proper Thank You then ?'', he asks seductively .

Letting the tunic fall she nods before taking a step towards him and throw her arms around him ,giving him a hug .

''Mm , is that all I get , Love ?'', he asks softly .

Looking up at him shyly she asks ''Do you want another kiss ?''.

He smiles and nods . ''Yes , but not just a peck , My Sweet ''.

Before she knows it his lips are pressed to hers and he's kissing her passionately . When he lets her go minutes later she's on cloud nine ,smiling lovingly up at him . He returns the smile as his heart swells with feeling for this sweet girl of his .

He can't wait to make her truly his . But not in this room of hers . In his quarters where no woman has slept with him before .

''I'll see you in the morning ,Alright ?'', he says reminding himself that his time is still so limited and that duty is calling him loudly .

She nods and sees him out . Before he goes he gives her a last peck on the lips causing her heart rate to flare up .

Oh how she loves that man .

 _ **THANKS FOR READING THIS CHAPTER . HOPE IT WASN'T TOO BORING . HUGS TO ALL READERS .**_


	4. Chapter 4

His Heart

Chapter 4

She sat leaning against the Inquisitor while staring into the embers of the campfire .

They had traveled the whole day to get to the first camp on their way to The Exalted Plains . They were still in the Frost Backs and it was freezing .

She would be glad when they get to Orlais where it was a bit warmer ,even though it was winter . She'll be able to shed the heavy coat she had to put on . She wasn't the only one dressed warmly . Even Solas had to put on shoes in this weather . She had heard him complain under his breath as they had to trudge through the snow that morning .

Maxwell shifted slightly in his seat , his one arm wrapped tightly around the girl . At first he wasn't sure if holding her in front of the others was the right thing . He was still so unsure of how anyone would react to them being together . Well, he did hold her hand the day before in front of many witnesses and he did buy her things . He couldn't hide it now .

''So ,Inquisitor , what will we do first if we reach the Plains ?'', Varric asks from across the fire .

''Well ,we'll see first what Scout Harding has for us , anyway we still have to go help Solas' friend ''.

Varric didn't comment on that as his eyes landed on the girl leaning against the Inquisitor.

He was happy for her . He knew she had been in love with the man since Haven . He never thought they'd get together ,though . The Inquisitor didn't seem the kind that'll choose a girl like her .

Carrie listened silently to their conversation . She felt tired and just wanted to go to bed , but she didn't want to leave the Inquisitor because she now had the chance to spend time with him, even if they weren't alone .

She yawns involuntarily, causing the Inquisitor to smile and say ''You should go to bed , Kiddo ''.

She shakes her head stubbornly ''But I don't want to '', she pouts .

''But you have to , so don't be so stubborn , just say goodnight and go '', he orders sternly .

With a sigh she gets up say ''Goodnight '', and walks away to the tent she'll be sharing with Cassandra .

Maxwell watches her go with mixed feelings . The fact that she didn't even spare him a kiss makes him feel down . Even a hug would have done nicely . He'll tell her that in the morning . She'll kiss or hug him soon enough without any shyness in front of the others . That he promised himself .

''Morning ,Kiddo '', Varric yawned as he came to sit by the fire .

Carrie had woke up early and had donned her new armor before she had come to bask in the warm glow of the fire .

''Morning , Varric , how did you sleep ?'', she says smiling at his disheveled look.

''Like a rock '', he grumbles plopping down next to her .

''Oh , no dreams then '', she teases even though she knew that dwarves don't dream .

''Gmf'', he snorts '', the day I dream is the day I go insane ''.

That causes her to giggle .''Yeah , I guess , but you have to admit that you can daydream or else you'd have no imagination ''.

Smiling at her mischievously he says ''Like you have daydreamed about the Inquisitor ?, oh , ho , do dream about kissing him ,letting him touch you all over ?''.

Blushing scarlet she begs ''Please , Varric , don't ''.

He bursts out laughing as her face grows redder . She starts giggling uncontrollably .

''Well , aren't we having fun this morning '', a voice as cold as the snow on the Frost Backs reaches their ears causing them to sober .

It's the Inquisitor and he isn't in a great mood this morning .

''Sorry , Inquisitor ,''Carrie apologizes on both of their behalves .

He just gives her a cold look before stomping off to go do his morning business .

That hurts her feelings more than she'd ever let him know .

The spiky pillars keeping the Pride demon bound wasn't easy to break . Carrie was growing tired of shooting spell after spell at it . Then there was also the beast itself that she and the others had to watch out for . Ducking and diving out of the way of those huge swinging muscled arms was not so easy . They had to know where to step and when to duck or dive . It was crazy .

Carrie focused on getting down the pillars only . She did not focus on the Inquisitor who helped Solas . She was firm on herself not to get distracted . If did get distracted , she knew it could mean certain death .

Maxwell spared her only one glance as he helped Solas . He only wanted to know that she was safe enough even if she was in danger .

The pillars were hard to break ,but with brute force of Bull's axe , Blackwall's claymore , Cassandra's mace and his war hammer as well as Varric 's crossbow bolts and the magic flowing out of the mages' staffs the pillars gradually fell one after the other until they were no more .

More than an hour after the pillars fell Carrie found herself in an Inquisition camp . The Inquisitor had decided that they'll rest for a bit before they continue their laborious job of ridding the place of undead and demons alike .

Solas had left after his friend was saved . If you could call a dying spirit saved . She was worried about Solas now as she sat there squashed in between Dorian and Cassandra , her eyes on the man she loved .

He was still in a mood it seemed and she didn't want to face his wrath right now . So she kept to herself as her eyes ravished him .

She hoped to The Maker that he won't stay in that dark mood for longer than he already have because she wanted to see him all smiles again .

The rest of the day went by in a blur as they found the battle trenches full of demons , Venatori and undead . They had to fight hard because the demons was actually Arcane Horrors and they were very much strong to the point that Carrie felt that they might not win against them .But they prevailed and so they went onto finding the Dalish camp and doing some tasks to gain their trust .

It was hard chasing a Halla towards the Dalish camp as it didn't want go straight there . It ran this way and that causing he group to tire easily and feel that they may never get it to go where they wanted it to go.

It was almost evening when they finally chased it into camp , getting many thanks from the Halla herder or whatever he is called . Carrie didn't know she only thought of shepherds and that gave her the idea of Halla herder .

When they got to camp again they were so tired that they all just walked off to bed , but not before Maxwell stole a quick kiss and a hug from his girl , which surprised her as well as lifted her spirit . It seemed that he wasn't in a bad mood anymore .

For a few more days they did what they could for the people in the Plains ,but eventually had to head back to Skyhold because there were some bridges and such things in the Plains that needed repairs and they had to go and commission some workers for that tasks .

Carrie wasn't happy to be back at Skyhold because she was afraid that now the Inquisitor wouldn't have time for her again . She knew how busy he was , so he almost always had to speak only a few words with everyone .

She found herself working hard again herself as the days passed before they were summoned to the War Room again one morning .

There they were told who was going to be going with the Inquisitor to the Emerald Graves . She wasn't chosen and that hurt her a bit , but she had no say in the matter . She had only the hope of being chosen the next time around .

It was while he was away that a group of nobles from the Free Marches came to visit . Amongst them was two young woman who seemed to know the Inquisitor extremely well . One was Sabrina Paisley and the other was Eleanor Hayens . Both seemed to be in love with him and so had a little competition going on who would catch his eye first when he came back .

''I don't know , My ladies , but you are a little too late because our one little Kiddo has caught his heart already '', Varric who also hadn't been chosen said to them at dinner that very first evening and luckily for Carrie they didn't know who this 'Kiddo 'was until for some reason Leliana called her by that name the next morning and Carrie found that the two women could be quite vicious when they wanted to be .And because they were noble she couldn't lift a finger to protect herself when one shoved her down from the upper part of Skyhold's grounds a day or two later . Lucky for her she fell on a tent that was there for the wounded who had not gotten a bed in the infirmary .

She only got away with a minor scratch on her arm .

She was glad when the Inquisitor came back from his endeavors four weeks later and didn't even much as look at them as his eyes caught her first . She smiled brightly at him when he smiled that oh so rare sexy smile of his .

Their relationship strengthens with each passing day . Some days he and she takes the time to steal a kiss in private . Sometimes they just talk . Sabrina and Eleanor are getting more and more jealous with each moment whenever they see the Inquisitor and Carrie together .

One night after having dinner with Varric and the rest of the Inner Circle she walks back to her quarters in the dark when out of nowhere a shadowy figure jumps at her with a knife gleaming in its hand . If she didn't dive out of the way she'd be surely dead , but she didn't get away without a scratch because the figure made ready for another attack and this time the knife cut her arm from shoulder to elbow . She screamed in pain . This didn't scare her attacker off instead the figure attacked again cutting her cheek when she tried pushing it away . She screams again . Her cheek stung . She became sort of woozy fairly quickly and was certain that the knife must be poisoned . She fell to her knees as her feet gave out at the moment she realized that the knife was probably poisoned . She tried weakly to stop the figure when it made to stab her in the chest . It was no use . The knife went through and she toppled over losing all consciousness .

'' She was lucky that her heart didn't sit on that side of her chest '', the surgeon told a very worried and distraught Inquisitor .

He and the others were too late to catch her attacker . He could kick himself for not just leaving his boots and shirt . He could've been there so much faster .

''She's going to live ,right ?'', he asks his voice hopeful .

She sighs and shrugs .''Inquisitor , she's been poisoned and the knife cut her three times remember ?, I can try helping her , but I can't guarantee that she'll live ''.

He stiffened at her words . His body felt suddenly so cold at hearing those words . No he couldn't lose his love right now . Not when he found her .

''May I see her ?'', he asks , his voice sounding numb .

The surgeon nods . ''Go ahead , stay as long as you want , Inquisitor ''.

He nodded , but said nothing . All he wanted now was to be with his heart . And he'll pray to the Maker to save her for him because he didn't want to lose her . She was his . He'll find whoever was her attacker and then that person would pay as well as the person who hired whoever the attacker was .

They will pay .And he would fight for her life . She would live .

With his jaw set in a determined line he walked to the bed where his beautiful Kiddo lay pale as a white sheet .

He would fight for her life . She would live .

 _ **I know this one is a bit short , but I hope to write a longer one next time . Hugs to all readers .**_


	5. Chapter 5

His Heart

Chapter 5

She awoke feeling sore all over and for some reason one sore spot was between her legs where her womanhood was .

She didn't understand it and didn't know what to make of it, so she focused only on trying to get out of bed while she tried not to wince .

It was a struggle to get out of bed . She never thought she'd get it right . When she finally stood on her bare feet , holding onto the bed post to support her because she had a short dizzy spell before her head cleared and she found herself taking in the room almost gasping because it wasn't the infirmary or her one quarters .

No , it was the Inquisitor's Quarters! . The place nobody was really allowed to be in . except if he invited them .

How the Andraste's Blooming Bloomers had she missed this important detail ?!.

She wasn't sure why it caused her to have an anxiety attack ,but it did and she didn't understand why the Maker she was having such feelings . Breathing in and out deeply didn't help .

She didn't calm down and every breath she took became a struggle as it felt as if she couldn't breathe at all . She fell to the floor clutching and clawing at her throat for air .

As if luck would want to help her calm down the Inquisitor walks up the stairs , halting when he sees her .

With an alarmed expression he rushed towards the girl who struggled on the floor .

He ignored it that she was dressed in that see through nightdress . His only thought was to help her .

Grabbing hold of her hands , pulling them away from her throat ,he orders ''Calm down , Kiddo , you're safe , no one can get you here , I promise you that ''.

She didn't calm down as memories of what happened came rushing through her mind , while something else nudged at her conscience .Something that was obviously silly to think of at a time like this .

She didn't understand why being in the Inquisitor's Quarters caused the anxiety attack . Was it the knowledge of being there ?, or was it the sort of vague memory of someone kissing and making love to her that caused it ?. She couldn't be sure . All she did was beginning to cry like she'd never cried before . She could've filled a river with the tears that spilled down her cheeks and all the while the Inquisitor tried to calm her without success of course .

He could only sit there beside her , holding her against him until finally after more than an hour she calmed down well enough so that he could let go and look at her and talk to her without having to worry that she'll start crying again .

''Feeling better ?'', he asks softly .

She nods , though she's not sure how she feels . Her wounds ached . Her whole body ached , yet her mind was numb .

''Come , I'll help you lay down again , you shouldn't have gotten out of bed so soon ''.

She didn't protest when he helped her back into bed . She did feel a bit awkward , though , because it was _his_ bed .

For a few moments there's only silence before she asks '' What happened ?, why am I here ?, did I miss something important ?, why do I hurt everywhere, even between….err …'',her voice trails off as she speaks , her cheeks becoming as red as a tomato .

Maxwell became pale at hearing those words and knew that it was time to explain to her what had happened since the attack on her . He had to give her the awful news that might break them apart .

He wasn't ready . He didn't want to lose her . He loved her more than anything in the world .

He knew that he might lose her if he told her everything that came to pass and that was what caused him to want to run for the hills and hide away until the world was no more .

But he couldn't.

He had to remember it as it was two days prior to her waking up ….

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''Inquisitor , Mother Giselle has asked the men of the Inner Circle to meet her inside her chambers '', Varric says to Maxwell who sat on a chair inside the Infirmary staring down at the feverish Kiddo .

Nothing seemed to help . No potion and no other remedy . The fever didn't want to break . He felt so hopeless .

''What does she want , Varric , don't she care that I need to keep fighting for Kiddo's life , I can't let her die , I just can't ''.

Everyone in the Inquisition knew that their Inquisitor was out of sorts since the attack on his Love .Everyone knew that her laying in the infirmary , probably dying , distracted him from his duties .

Mother Giselle as well and she had a solution that would save the girl , even if it was a little unorthodox .So she send Varric to collect all of the men in the Inquisition's Inner Circle , Commander Cullen included .That's why Varric is standing here right now trying to convince Maxwell to leave Kiddo's side .

''She knows of a way to save Kiddo '', Varric explains , ''she wants to talk to us about it , if it saves our Kiddo I'd do whatever it takes , Inquisitor , so come on , get your ass out of that chair and let's go !''.

It took Varric two more tries before Maxwell followed him .

Mother Giselle was waiting for them . The others were already there .

''Have you found some new remedy ?'', Maxwell asks immediately and the old woman just shakes her head .

''It is an old method , unorthodox , but I know that it had saved lives in the past , I've seen it done twice in my life , now ,Inquisitor, well, since you're do not know what I am talking about , in the past healers who've found a patient that had an incurable fever had used this ….well …method … the healer would then make love to the patient or find someone who would do it and so in some unexplained reason the fever will be gone right after the deed and that is why I have called you all , Kiddo needs that method right now , the healer you call the Surgeon are beginning to give up in her scientific ways , mage healers also can't help the girl since they have tried , that is why one of you must use this method if you want Kiddo to survive , I think , since she is your lover , Inquisitor , you get to choose who must do this , I'll go wait inside the infirmary for whoever is chosen and I'll keep an eye on Kiddo , just remember time is of the essence , you cannot delay in this matter ''.

She doesn't give them time to utter a word as she leaves . She don't want them to delay any further in their choosing .

''Wow , the Revered Mother is one strange old gal '', Varric says when she is out of earshot .

''Yeah , but why call all of us when only one of us is needed ?'', Bull grumbles .

''Probably because not all of us would want to do what she want us to , maybe she just hope we'll help in the choosing '', Cullen says looking a bit flustered .

Maxwell didn't know what to think of it . He knew if he chose to do this , he'd spend his life wondering what if there was another remedy out there to break that damn fever , and he just did what the old Mother wanted .

''I don't know if it'll help ,'' Dorian says ,''but if none of you are willing , I'll do it , I am not in love with her and I like men , so maybe she won't mind if I helped her since I am not so attached to her ''.

''I could do it too , but I am not keen on human girls , and what if it does not help ?, what if she finds out when she wakes that one of us …oh , I cannot even say the word ''.

''I just want to help , it's my purpose ,right , I have tried helping her , but she is blocking me from her mind , in this way I can help her , though , I don't know how to do it '',Cole says frowning .

''We need to decide , I am willing , but I say like Mother Giselle that the Inquisitor gets to choose '', Blackwall says .

Everyone turns to the quiet man who stood staring at the floor , his eyes a bit diluted as he was a bit zoned out .

''Inquisitor !'', Solas calls softly ,''Inquisitor , who do you choose ?, Inquisitor !''.

Snapping out of it he asks stupidly ''Huh?, I mean I don't know who to choose, isn't there something else we can do ?''.

Solas sighs , '' Unfortunately no ,Inquisitor , so choose , time is running out , I've heard the surgeon say that Kiddo won't make it to tomorrow ''.

Sighing deeply Maxwell squares his shoulders ''Then I guess I'll do it myself , though , I just hope this don't come bite me in the ass one day ''.

The others had nothing to say that could assure them that it wouldn't .They accompanied him to the infirmary and found Mother Giselle waiting for them .

''Quickly !, her fever has gone up a bit more !'', she called , sounding devastatingly anxious .

So Maxwell nodded to the others and rushed in there . What happened next was something he wished he could forget because he felt like he was raping the girl because she wasn't fully conscious .

He had undressed after asking the old woman to leave him alone with Kiddo because he didn't want an audience . Then he'd touched Kiddo's burning forehead and made a promise to her that he'd do whatever it takes to save her . He didn't want his little Love to die . After that he'd pulled the covers off ,of her and climbed carefully ,as to not jostle her, on the bed .

He didn't look at her naked body as he had pushed her legs apart , but he did want to do it the right way so he kissed her with his eyes closed . Kissed her burning face , her chapped lips , her neck . He didn't want to rush into it and do like the Quinari does . He also needed to feel it , feel that desire that he wasn't feeling right now . All he felt was sadness because he knew that if this didn't have to happen their first time together would've been quite special . She would've been conscious and loving it . Now she wasn't and he could do nothing but aid her in recovery .

When he finally did push into her , he was shocked at her strangled cry ,because in her half feverish conscious state she could feel the pain of him taking away that innocence , that virtue that nobody has ever touched before . That hurt him and sickened him to think if he hadn't done it , Solas, Blackwall or anyone of the others would've and they wouldn't have felt the shame he felt now .

He had finished the job even if it hurt him to do so . He knew that she was bleeding when he finished . He knew that she was now almost fully conscious and hoped to the Maker she didn't remember what he did . When he left he stumbled through the door and Iron Bull caught him when he almost fell . When Mother Giselle had asked him if Kiddo was alright , he'd nodded without any enthusiasm before he had left to go lay down on his bed while thinking of what to do if Kiddo asked about her innocence .

That night however someone had tried again to kill her , but they found two of Leliana's agents looking after Kiddo and found their end . They were two women working together to get the third competition out of their way it seemed . They were Sabrina Paisley and Eleanor Hayens . Two Noble women who died at the hands of Inquisition Agents and that is why Kiddo was moved because he was afraid that someone else might try in vengeance , like Sabrina's brother who was pretty much angry at what happened to his sister .

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Carrie was shocked at hearing his story . She knew by the way he sounded that this was the truth . She was grateful that he took it upon himself instead of letting the others do it .

The only thing was that now she had lost something precious to her . Something she had kept for so long .

It was lost forever now .

She wouldn't be able to ever get it back .

She looked at the man who sat at the foot of the bed and wondered that if he didn't do it , would she have forgiven him for letting Dorian or even Cole touch her ?. She'd probably despise him .

''I'm sorry , Kiddo , if this hurt you , I can imagine how you must feel right now , but believe me it was either that or you'd have died and I didn't want to lose you and give those people the satisfaction , believe me when I say that I love you , even if you're a mage that could turn into an abomination at any moment , I know you passed your Harrowing with flying colors , but Cullen said that even if you did you could still fall into temptation , anyway I'll leave you to get some rest , and please try to understand that there was no other way to save you , I love you , Kiddo , I love you more than anything this damn world could offer me , so anyway , hope you'll recover more quickly now and if something bothers you come see me , I'll always give you the time of day , even if I'm a bit busy ''.

With that little speech out of the way , he leaves her alone to process everything on her own . She wanted to call him back , but kept herself from doing so .She didn't want to be a bother further and she had many things to think about , especially what had happened to her .

It wasn't long before she became drowsy . She tried fighting it . She didn't want to be asleep in case someone came back to finish the job ,even if she knew that guards watched the door .There was the balcony . Someone could try climbing the wall .

Her struggle to stay awake was in vain ,so after a few moments her eyes closed and she fell asleep .

She awoke that evening feeling a little less sore and very hungry . She was about to get out of bed when a young servant girl followed by Cassandra and Leliana walked in . The girl carried a tray and the two woman carried some clothes .

''Sorry we hadn't come to check up on you , we were quite busy with some group of Nobles who heard of the death of those two would be assassins '', Leliana says as she places her bundle of clothes on the couch near the railing .

Carrie didn't know what to reply . All she knew was that for obvious reasons she was now a target of every Noble who'd want to sent assassins after someone , meaning her obviously ,and she could do nothing but pray to the Maker to give her all the help he can .And obviously protect her .

''The Inquisitor asked us to bring you some clothes '', Cassandra adds ,''and some food , you must be hungry since you haven't eaten for a few days , but don't eat too fast , you'll become sick if you do ''.

Carrie didn't know what to think of that . She'd have wanted him to come , but it seems that he was still a bit ashamed of what had happened .

She ate the soup on the tray that the servant girl placed in her lap slowly . The bread she ignored as well as the sweet warm milk ,that really didn't go right with soup .

The two woman watched her as she ate ,making her feel a bit uncomfortable . She knew that they didn't mean to stare , but she couldn't help but wish for them to stop looking at her .

They never really cared much for her , she couldn't understand why they would start now .

They never actually had the need to speak much to her . She was always the girl that they send around o errands , not their friend . She wondered why they came to see her now .

Was there something they wanted her to do ?. Were they truly trying to be her friends ?.She wasn't sure , but became suspicious when she caught a look they shared and knew that something was up that she knew nothing about .

After eating half of the soup she was full and said so to the servant who took the tray immediately and left ,leaving her alone with the two .

That's when things change and all friendliness seems to vanish .

''Kiddo, now that we're alone we'd like to speak to you about something important '', Leliana says in a tone that spelled nothing good for Carrie .

''It's about you and the Inquisitor '', Cassandra adds equally unfriendly . Carrie had heard her use that tone with Varric before and it wasn't fun having it directed at her .

''We want you to listen and not interrupt '', Leliana says '', it is important that you understand and we want you to think about it ''.

''The Inquisitor cannot be distracted , you are his biggest distraction , Kiddo , and because of that we are willing to help you leave the Inquisition , we'll pay you enough money so that you won't have to fend for yourself for awhile , all we ask of you in return is to leave and not to come back , ever . He hasn't done his duties since the attack two weeks ago . He doesn't sleep . He doesn't eat . And because of you we've lost some of the Noble's support . We need them if this Inquisition is going to survive and stop Corypheus . Just leave ,Kiddo , we don't need an Inquisitor that is distracted by a common girl like you . You will always be his downfall . He would always shirk on his duties while you're here . He needs to do his duties , not look after you . So, we'll help you . We'll even find someone who could escort you out of here . The Inquisition don't need you . The Inquisition needs the Inquisitor . Think about it and come tell us , but remember if you choose to stay we'll make sure you'll regret it ''.

Cassandra's words hurt more than Carrie would ever admit and as she watch them leave she knew for sure what she'll choose . Something she must have done ages ago when everyone treated her like they did from the beginning .

She frowned when mere seconds after they left , Varric came walking in and she could see it on his face that he had heard Cassandra and Leliana's words .

''How do you feel ?'', he asks , trying to be casual ,yet failing .

She shrugs . What can she say?. Those two made it clear what they thought of her .

''The Inquisitor is going to be devastated if you leave ,Kiddo , so please don't go because they told you so ''.

She sighs and push the covers off of her . Swinging her legs off the bed she places her feet firmly on the thick Orlesian carpet that portrayed the Inquisition's colors .

''I must leave , Varric , I don't want to be anyone's burden . I don't want them to have the satisfaction of hurting me further . But if I leave , I don't want their money , I don't want to be known as the girl who could be bought . Varric , would you please tell him the truth , that I left without taking their money and ,Varric ,please tell him that I don't despise him for doing what he did to save me , I appreciate everything he's done for me . I'll write a letter that you could give him if he doesn't believe you and tell him not to be angry with them because they are right , I am just a common girl and he is so , so much more , and I am not really needed , he is , and that he shouldn't get distracted . I'll be leaving tonight and I'll be leaving everything he gave me here because it'll be too much to carry , I don't want to be known as a mage when I am out in the world so I'll leave my staff too , you are my only friend right now , Varric , I need you to help me ''.

Varric didn't protest . He understood completely why she wanted to leave . She was sacrificing being happy with the one person she loves for the greater good of the Inquisition .

He knew also that no matter how much he'd try to stop her from leaving , she'll leave eventually with or without his help .

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Lord Inquisitor Maxwell Trevelyan stood on his quarters balcony staring into nothingness .

His thoughts was on the girl who had left the Inquisition without saying goodbye to him in person .

He thought of that as a cowardly act , even if Varric had explained to him that it wasn't , that she had left so that he'd not be distracted by her .

His heart hurt so much . He loved her so very much . He couldn't understand how she could listen to two women who didn't even care about her feeling , or his for that matter . All they wanted was to win this damn war against that damn Corypheus .

 _Damn it , Kiddo, why ?why did you leave me to hurt like this ?._

He knew that he'd never get the answer ,but it felt good to ask even if she couldn't hear him .

Footsteps behind him alerted him that he wasn't alone anymore . He knew who it was before the person could speak .

''Come to gloat , Cassandra ?'', he asks coldly ,'' get it over with , say what you want to , I am all ears ''.

She didn't speak , though . She did however wrap an arm around him , hugging him to her .

He wanted to push her away , but didn't ,and somehow he knew that later he'd regret not doing that .

He just stands there feeling the pain of his loss wash over him . The pain of Kiddo leaving him would always be with him , he knew . There was no chance for him to make anything right again . No chance for him to stop her from leaving him .

After a while he pulls away from Cassandra , giving her a look that told her that he knew that she was involved and she didn't know who told him . Did Kiddo talk to him before leaving ?. She hoped not .

''I'll do my duties from now on , Cassandra , I hope you and everyone are happy now , you won't have to worry that I'll lose my heart to someone so fickle again , but know this I will never forgive you or anyone else involved in her leaving , I will always remember what you and they did ''.

His harsh words causes her heart to become heavy with guilt ,but because she knew perfectly well that it was too late to try and make it right , she'd endure his coldness and hope to the Maker that he'll be the person she met again one day .

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''Where is this ship going , Jodran ?'', Carrie asked the young man as she stared at the foreign ship docked in the Port of Val Royeaux .

''They say some foreign country far away from here , I think in the far North ''.

Jodran was a young street rat like everyone who Carrie had met in her two months since she'd left the Inquisition .

She'd come to Val Royeaux ,hoping to find some work , but it didn't work out that way , so she became one of the poor street rats taking any scraps she could find .

She'd become slimmer and she was dirty . Her clothes were in tatters and she lived in an alleyway with two other girls and Jodran .

Because she looked younger than she was nobody asked her anything and nobody thought her to old to be one of the urchins on the streets of Val Royeaux .

''Do they take in new crew members ?'', she asks .

Jodran shrugs ,''I don't know , if they do , I'll be the first one to go ask for a job ''.

''Well , why don't we go ask , Jodran ?, I am sure we could get some work if we ask ''.

Being taller than her , Jodran looked down at her frowning slightly ''They won't take in a girl , Carrie , they'll probably throw you off the ship ''.

''I could do what Mayra does , Jodran , I could pass as a boy , please , come with me , I really just want to leave this awful life , maybe this far North isn't so bad as everyone thinks ''.

''Everyone thinks ?, Carrie , don't be daft , nobody knows if this far North really exists , by the Maker , you are really odd , but alright I'll help you find bigger clothes that will fit loosely and I'm sure Mayra would help you bind your …err …breasts ''.

She just rolled her eyes at him and smiled at the way his face resembled a tomato .

It was two hours later when they walked onto the ship asking for the Captain . Carrie resembled a young boy wearing too big clothing .Mayra had done her best to make the girl look like that .

To help her not stand out Jodran had donned clothes that was a bit too big for him too .For that she was grateful .

''The captain is in his cabin , if you wait here I will ask him if he'll grant the two of you an audience '', one snooty looking man says in a formal way .

While the man is away Jodran and Carrie takes the time to look around the ship . It was a real one . Not like the boats that laid on anchor at the Storm Coast .

Carrie couldn't help to admire every part of it .The woodwork . The sails . The crew who sang as they worked , mending sails or scrubbing the deck .

It was half an hour before the man came back telling them that the captain will see them .

Orius Savellian was a tall black haired man with eyes as blue as the sky of his homeland .He had a few scars on his bearded face , one running over his right cheek reminding Carrie of Cassandra and why she'd left the Inquisition .

She didn't want to so she tried focusing on getting a job from the man .

''So let me get this straight , you two kids wants me to give you a job so that you can leave this part of the world ?, I have a cabin boy and I don't need more crew ''.

He sounded so stern . Carrie wasn't sure if she should cry or not . She didn't want to make a fool of herself , though .

''Please , Ser, we need work , Val Royeaux don't hire people like us and the docks don't have space either , we'll even work for free '', Jodran pleads .

Carrie knew that he was desperate . She didn't know why , but she was willing to bet that it had something to do with some smugglers that Jodran had done a job for once long ago before Carrie had met him and the other two Mayra and Ganine . Ganine had told her that .

The man stares at the two ill dressed people . One was a very young teen and the other was a man barely out of his teens .

He did need more crew, even if he told them he didn't . The younger one , he could give to the cook as an assistant and the older one can start work as one of his deck crew .

''Can you cook ?'', he asks looking straight at Carrie .

''I don't know how , Serrah , but I could learn quickly , please don't turn us away ''.

Carrie had practiced to sound more like a boy . She didn't know if she would fail that ,but at the looks of it she didn't .

''Fine , although , I don't really need more crew ,I guess I can make an exception , what is your names so I can write it in the ship's log ''.

''Jodran ''.

''Carr..'',Carrie begins ,but stops herself . She wasn't a girl right now . She was supposed to be a boy .

''Carr ?, odd name ,but fine …Jodran , go find First Mate Mac gro-Azgru he'll put you to work , Carr , I shall take you to see the Cook , he have been whining for ages about an assistant I am sure that the old man would love to finally have one ''.

Carrie just smiled politely , hoping that the old Cook would really love that after she'd burnt some stew .She didn't want to be thrown off of the ship for that .

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 **SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG . MY LAPTOP HAD BEEN IN FOR SOME REPAIRS AND STILL ISNT REALLY ALRIGHT BECAUSE OF THE DISK TRAY MAKING WEIRD NOISES , BUT YEAH , SO HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS ONE , HUGS TO ALL READERS , PLEASE REVIEW AND COMMENT . OH AND I'VE DECIDED ON TURNING THIS INTO A CROSS OVER . CARRIE NEEDS TO GET SOME BACKBONE . I KNOW IT'S CALLED HIS HEART ,BUT I THINK YOU ALL KNOW WHAT A CRY BABY CARRIE IS SO I THOUGHT OF GIVVING HER A BIT OF A MAKEOVER . DON'T WORRY SHE'LL SEE HER INQUISITOR AGAIN IN THE FUTURE , BUT SHE'LL BE A BETTER PERSON THEN .**


	6. Chapter 6

His Heart

Chapter 6

Being the Cook's assistant wasn't too bad if you peeled the potatoes right and washed the dishes clean .

Carrie begun to enjoy being an assistant to the old Nord Helm Wrath-Horker . Why he had sort of an Avvar name Carrie didn't know ,but she didn't ask either .

He helped took good care of her . Kept her well fed and even gave her warmer clothes that he promised she'd need once night came .

The clothes was a bit big , but because she acted as a boy it concealed that which made her a girl .

It was warm in the kitchen with the old coal stove and the constant cooking that went on in there . She slept in one corner on a bunk that Helm told her belonged to no one . She had a sneaking suspicion that it belonged to him and that he gave it to her out of the goodness of his heart .

She didn't forget why she left Thedas , though . She missed Skyhold and she missed the few friends she had . She missed her horse , the Horse Master and all the fighting with her staff .

Most of all she missed the Inquisitor . She dreamt of him most nights and cried herself to sleep when the longing became too hard to bear .

She didn't know if Varric had given him the letter and told him the truth .She hoped that he could forgive her for leaving . She was a coward ,she know , but she didn't want more trouble , especially from Leliana and Cassandra .

Her wounds had healed , but the scars remained , especially the one on her cheek that gave her a different feature . She wasn't that pretty girl that she'd been . Her scars caused that change . She didn't mind , though . She could go with having scars .

She saw the light of day every morning and afternoon as she served the stews , soups or other foods .At night she stood on the deck with Jodran and heard stories of the lands that they were sailing to from the one crew member ,Eormund .

Cyrodil was their main stop and it is there that Jodran wished to leave the service of Captain Orius Savellian. Carrie would follow him .

It was on this ship that they learned about the far North's strange non-Human races . Well , not all of them , but some ,like the Orcs and the Bosmer .

The first time Carrie saw an Orc she thought _Abomination !,_ but he wasn't . All he was ,was a big green mean man with tusks . The Bosmer was a very tanned _Elf_ with oddly protruding brows and narrow eyes . She'd never seen any elf like that one .

The rest of the races on the ship were human and had strange names like Redguard and Breton . Savellian was an Imperial and she wondered if they were actually descended from Tevinter .

Helm was a Nord and so was Eormund . Big and strong like Avvar .

It would take them six months to get back to Cyrodil and because of that the ship were loaded with provisions .

Carrie was in her second month on the ship and had , had to hide the fact that she had ,had her monthlies twice already . That made her feel relieved ,though ,because she knew at least she wasn't pregnant . That would've been a huge problem . Nobody could ever hide something like that .

Carrie just hoped that they'd never discover her and Jodran's secret . Being a girl on a ship with very superstitious men was a bad thing .

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''You dreaming or what , Carr ?!'', Helm's sharp voice calls Carrie back to reality . She'd been thinking about the Inquisition again and she'd been wondering if the war was over yet .

''No , I'm scrubbing this damn pot ,Helm '', she says showing him the pot that she'd been truly busy scrubbing ,until a few minutes ago , that is .

''Oh , well ,keep scrubbing , Boy , and let it be a lesson never to burn potato soup again '', he grumbles walking away , leaving her to it .

 _Four months ,_ she thought _,four damn months since leaving Skyhold and I am still not over the damn place ._

She shook her head as she resumed scrubbing the stinking burnt pot , while listening to Helm singing a song of dragons and whatnot . He was a bit false , but she didn't care as long as he didn't mind her humming along .

''Hey , Helm , tell me about your homeland ", she asks after a few more songs .

''You mean Skyrim ?, well it is like any other country I suppose ,with tall mountains , green tall trees ,wildlife and such , but it is home and I miss her , she is where I gave my first cries as a wee babe , my Pa was a Companion of Jorrvaskr when he met my Ma , she was the Jarl's servant and had eyes only for the son of the Jarl at the time , even though he was out of her league . Married my Pa later and had me and Elsa ,my sister , happy times , Carr , happy times ''.

''Out of her League ?, I knew a girl who used to be in love with a man out of her League , a Noble of the Free Marches , he fell in love with her , but it didn't last because some other people interfered ''.

Helm would never know that she was talking about herself .

''Poor girl , did she at least find someone like my Ma found my Pa?''.

''No , I suppose she won't ever find someone she'd love as much , anyway ,is this pot clean enough ?''.

Helm frowned at the boy who sometimes talked like a girl with a boy's voice , but said nothing just checked the pot .

Later that day as she sat listening to the stories of these people's homeland she thought of her own and wondered once again how things were faring there .

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Maxwell stood on the edge of a camp glaring at the cold harshness of the Frostbacks . He and some of his team were headed to Sarnia that was situated in Emprise Du Lion .

It was at Cullen's request and he was happy to help . Well , to do something other than be at Skyhold where he had come to hate his life .

It seemed only his team members understood his drive to do something practical to keep his mind off of the girl who he had begun to miss very much .

He had taken her clothes and had sold all ,but her Mage armor and staff . He was quite sad and wanted to hold onto something of her . He often wondered why he had bothered to save her if he couldn't even have her by his side .

Varric, on his behalf , had start sending contacts out to search for her and he'd learned that she had left on a ship dressed as a boy , but to where she was going , the contacts couldn't say .

It hurt that she'd done something like that . Left this part of Thedas without a trace .

''Boss , the stew is ready '', Bulls voice brings him out of his reverie .

Poor Bull , he missed the girl too even if he had treated her a bit badly in the past .

Everyone missed her . Even Sera who hadn't treated her well either and also Josephine who had been shocked to hear that Kiddo had left .

Mother Giselle wasn't happy about it . She had believed in the young love between the Inquisitor and his Kiddo .

''I'll eat later , Bull , you can dish up for the others '', he says turning to look at the others who sat looking at him in a manner that told him that they didn't want him to know that they were watching him .''Varric , could you please get me one of that bottles of ale that you were bragging about earlier ?''.

Varric didn't know what to think as he got up to go get the man what he wanted . He hoped that the Inquisitor didn't become a drunk . Thedas didn't need that.

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''Land Ho !'', someone called from the Crow's nest .

Carrie could hear him from where she cleaned up the kitchen . Helm grinned broadly as he threw down his apron to go see .

''Come on , Carr , you can't miss seeing Cyrodil for the first time !'', he calls as he passes her .

Nodding she put away the broom to run after him .

Jodran joined her as she ran to the front of the ship where the captain stood .

Their first glimpse of this new land was of grass and hills and in the distance a high tower .

''That's the White Gold tower also known as the Imperial Palace , home of Titus Mede the second '', Helm explains when Carrie asks about the tower .''You'll be seeing it properly very soon , we'll be sailing there ''.

They did indeed using a very wide river that seemed quite deep .They caught glimpses of towns and Forts and other structures they didn't really recognize as the ship sailed past .

''Look , Carr , no scarred sky !'', Jodran calls pointing up .

''And no Red Templars or Blights or an Inquisitor '', she says quietly hoping he won't hear her .He didn't .

It was late afternoon when they finally saw the Imperial City .

Ships as big as the one they were on laid on anchor . There was a wall build in a half circle and a tower in the middle of a small manmade Island . The wall looked ancient .

Helm had told her that normally they'd dock at Anvil , but the Captain had something he had to deliver to His Majesty the Emperor and it was important that they docked there .

Carrie was happy that they did and was even happier when they got paid even if they did say that they'd work for free .

They first helped to unload some of the things brought from Thedas before they greeted their fellow crew members and walked into the city via a bridge that stopped at a gate . They didn't look at the Waterfront with its white crumbling walls . No they wanted to reach the City's inner walls and start exploring while there was still a bit of daylight left .

''Where do you think we'll find an Inn ?'', Carrie asks as they walk through one of the Districts .

''Probably at the Waterfront or maybe if we walk around , we'd find a decent enough one , but I say if we do find one , we ask the owner if he knows of work that we can do to get more coin , this coin of ours won't last forever ''.

She wasn't sure if they'd find work , but now in this new land she was hopeful . It was late when they found an Inn that was cheap enough for them ,yet decent and clean enough . It was there that they saw their first Beast Folk . Two Khajit and an Argonian .

''If you need work I'd suggest the Khajit over there , he is a merchant and he is hiring '', the Inn Keeper says when they ask about work .

Jodran was the one who approached the cat person . He did need two hands and he told Jodran that he'd be willing to pay double if one of them could cook . Carrie was then assigned to cooking duty and even if she didn't like it , she did her job with a smile .

For three months they travel Cyrodil with the old Khajit who went by the name K'Jeer .

Carrie had been away from the Inquisition for eleven months now . She didn't forget it , but she felt far better now than she had felt the first few months .

Traveling they heard more stories , especially about the Civil war that was going on in Skyrim .

Jodran told her that he was glad that they weren't there , but as curious as Carrie was she wanted to go visit this land that Helm had spoke so much about on the voyage . So one morning when her fourth month with K'Jeer would start she decides to leave his service . He accepts when she tells him that she'd like to see more of this continent called Nirn and Tamriel was part of it . Meaning she'd like to see the other Provinces .

''Be sure to visit Elswyer '', is K'Jeer's parting words . She nods as she walks away leaving Jodran who had decided to stay with the merchant behind .

#####################################################

She hummed a tune as she walked down the road from Bruma to the pass through the mountains that would take her to Skyrim . She'd traveled by Carriage to the City and from there she had to walk because there were no Carriages going to Skyrim at the moment since there was a war .

She had no choice but to walk alone . No other people were going to Skyrim and even if it was dangerous to walk alone , she couldn't wait around for someone to go . It could take months .

She took in her surroundings as she walked . Everywhere she looked was snow . It was freezing ,yet not more than the Frostbacks that she'd been used to .

She didn't want to be reminded of her homeland , or of Skyhold . She had decided to ,if she could work hard to forget and build a new life for herself . She was determined to do it . To proof that she was better than what Cassandra and Leliana thought of her .

The road was quiet ,with here and there a lone red fox or a rabbit . They were animals she'd not seen much of when she'd been in Thedas . They fascinated her ,reminding her of the Nugs of Thedas who were also small creatures .

To her surprise she comes across a couple of goats . They were different than those she had seen in Thedas with long white hair .

She saw Elk too . Three of them to be precise . They were grazing on lumps of grass sticking through the snow .

It takes her almost a week of trudging through the pass to get to the border ,which turned out to be a wooden archway and nothing else .

From there she'd look for a town or village to rest a bit , before she would decide on where to go, after she'd asked the locals about their land of course .

She hadn't taken two steps into Skyrim when a group of soldiers wearing red and brown leather armor attacks her and next thing she knows , she's thrown onto a wagon with three people, after being stripped of her belongings ,that weren't much , and being bound and dressed up in rags .

She didn't understand why she'd been captured and was being carted of somewhere , for no apparent reason.

Nobody spoke . They all seemed to be either too tired or down . Carrie didn't know how to speak with the others .They were big like Helm ,which told her that they were Nords . Other than that she knew nothing of them .It was best not to bother them with silly questions .

By nightfall they were lead off the wagon and tied to a tree while soldiers kept their eyes on them . Carrie found herself drifting off to sleep while the others didn't shut an eyelid .

The next morning she awoke on a different wagon with three men . Two were blond and the other had sort of reddish brown hair . The latter were dressed in rags like her .

One of the blonds wore a rich fur lined coat and his mouth was gagged . The other had a blue cuirass on .

They were big like the others .Nords obviously .

''Hey , You , You're finally awake . you were trying to cross the border , walked right into that Imperial Ambush same as us and the Horse thieve over there '', blond number two says looking at her .

Carrie didn't know if she should answer him or not and before she can do that the Horse thieve says in a very bitter voice ''Damn , you Stormcloaks , Skyrim was fine until you came along , Empire was nice and lazy , if they haven't been looking for you ,I could have stolen that horse and been halfway to Hammerfell by now '', he then turned his gaze upon Carrie adding '',You there , you and me , we shouldn't be here , it's these Stormcloaks the Empire wants ''.

Carrie didn't like his tone ,but had to agree with him since she'd been captured for no apparent reason .

''We're all brothers and sisters in binds now , Horse thieve '', blond number two states ironically .

''Shut up ,back there !'', the Wagon driver shouts ,but it's as if hear and see had scattered to the winds that blew coldly against Carrie , causing her to shiver .

''What's wrong with him , huh ?'', the thieve ask motioning with his head at blond number one with the gag over his mouth .

''Watch your tongue !, you're speaking to Ulfric Stormcloak , true High King !'', blond number two snaps at the thieve .

Carrie frowned as she remembered something that K'Jeer had mentioned about the leader of the rebellion . It felt odd being in the man's presence . The very man K'Jeer said was a racist bastard .

''Ulfric , Jarl of Windhelm , you're the leader of the rebellion , but if they captured you … oh gods where are they taking us?!'', the horse thieve groaned in alarm.

''I don't know where we're going , but Sovngarde awaits '', blond number two says gravely causing Carrie who'd wondered why the Thieve had sounded alarmed to feel fear in her heart . Helm had spoken to her about the Nordic afterlife , Sovngarde ,before and the blond saying that it awaited meant only one thing . Death .

''No , this can't be happening , this isn't happening '', the thieve moans .

Carrie felt pity for him as well as for herself and the others . She wished that she'd never left the safety of Cyrodil for the danger that she walked into . Though, she didn't know that danger awaited her when she walked into Skyrim .

''Hey , what village are you from , Horse thieve ?'', blond number two asks just as the procession of wagons nears a wooden palisade wall . Carrie didn't know if she should laugh or cry because she wasn't really sure what truly awaited them inside the walls .

''Why do you care ?'', the thieve asks bitterly .

''A Nord's last thoughts should be of home '', the blond says .

''Rorikstead , I am from Rorikstead '', the thieve says .

A few moments later the wagons passes under a walkway that was about the gates and Carrie heard one of the soldiers shout ''General Tulius , Sir , the headsman is waiting ''.

That information causes panic to grow inside of Carrie's heart as she realizes what was going to happene to her and the others .

Swallowing a dry lump in her throat she wished that she'd really known not to cross the border into Skyrim . She was going to die for this mistake and she didn't want to .

''Good let's get this over with'', a grey haired man in the same sort of armor as the rest calls from the back of a horse. He wasn't alone . An Altmer in robes sat with him .

''Shor , Mara , Dibella , Kynareth , Akatosh , Divines ,help me !'', the thieve begins praying , begging his gods .

Carrie didn't know if she should also pray . She wasn't sure that the Maker or Andraste would hear her .

''Look at him , General Tulius , the Military Governor , and it looks like the Thalmor are with him , Damn Elves .. bet they had something to do with this '', the blond grumbles before looking at Carrie stating ''This is Helgen , I used to be sweet on a girl from here , wonder if Vilod still makes that Mead from Juniper berries , funny when I was a boy Imperial walls and towers used to make me feel safe ''.

Carrie feels a sadness wash over her at hearing that . She wasn't in her homeland , but he was and he was even going to die in the village where his sweetheart lives . The Inquisitor would never know what happened to her and she won't be able to send a letter to Varric for obvious reasons . This was so unfair .

The wagons pulls up against a wall , near towers and the block where they'd be beheaded soon .

''Why are we stopping ?'', the horse thieve asks , stupidly in Carrie's opinion because surely he heard what the talkative blond had said .

''Why do you think , end of the line , let's go , the gods are waiting for us '', the blond reminded him as if hearing Carrie's thoughts .

''No , No , wait , we're not rebels !'', the thieve says in a panicky voice .

''Face your death with some courage '', the blond scolds ,but the thieve doesn't listen .

''You've got to tell them we weren't with you … this is a mistake '', he says pleadingly while they all gets up to jump down from the Wagon , one after the other to line up in front of a captain and another soldier .

The blond just ignores him while he falls into line behind Ulfric Stormcloak

''Empire loves their damn lists '', he grumbles when the captain tells them that when their names are called from the list that they should go wait near the block .

Carrie wonders if her name is even on that list . One way to find out , though . Wait and see and hope to the Maker that she'd be set free if it isn't .Just wait and see and obviously hope , for without hope there is nothing . Nothing .

#######################################

 _ **SORRY FOR THE SHORT CHAPTER . I AM SPRINGCLEANING BECAUSE MY BIGBROTHER IS COMING HOME FOR A VISIT . HUGS TO ALL READERS !.**_


	7. Chapter 7

His Heart

Chapter 7

 _ **Dear Varric**_

 _ **Life in Cyrodil is alright . I found work with a Khajit merchant as a cook .**_

 _ **Before I tell you about the voyage here to the land of Tamriel I'll explain what a Khajit is .**_

 _ **Khajit are cat people from a Province called Elsweyr . They walk on two legs like us and have fur as well as a tail . K'Jeer is a good boss and keeps me and Jodran , a boy from Val Royeaux fed . I never need anything .**_

 _ **The voyage here took six months . It was long and tiresome . I worked as the ship Cook's assistant to pay for my passage . The man was huge like an Avvar , but called himself a Nord . Though , they do have Avvar names ,like Helm and Eomund ,they aren't Avvar . I worked hard scrubbing pots and learned a lot about cooking . It wasn't for nothing that I became a Cook's assistant . For one I gained knowledge in cooking and in the other I heard legends of the far North .**_

 _ **Most people in the far North don't believe in the Maker . They have their Eight gods who has names that I haven't ever thought existed . Their chief god is portrayed as a dragon for some reason . Akatosh , the god of time .**_

 _ **They call their gods the Divines or the Eight when they curse or praise , it's like us when we say Andraste's ass or something more revolting .**_

 _ **This Tamriel is part of a vast continent called Nirn and people speak of other lands , but mostly of the Province of Skyrim , that is at war with the Empire of this land , a rebellion of sorts , I don't know why they rebel , but it seems the war between a faction called the Stormcloaks and the Empire of Tamriel had been going on for a while , the leader of the war is Ulfric Stormcloak , he seems to be an important man in Skyrim , Empire hates him , though.**_

 _ **I will be leaving K'Jeer soon and make my way to Skyrim ,because it sort of fascinates me , this war and the sound of the name SKYRIM , it reminds me of Skyhold , though , Skyhold isn't a Province and people don't look like this people .**_

 _ **I hope you are well Varric and I hope everyone else is too , especially the Inquisitor .**_

 _ **Some days I miss you all so much , except for some of you , of course .It is hard being in land and being classified into a race . Jodran jokes that if he wasn't a bit taller he'd be called a Breton like me .**_

 _ **Yeah , they call me a Breton and him an Imperial . There are four races of man and more races of elf that I have ever seen in my entire life . And then there is the two races of Beast Folk , but K'Jeer said that in other parts of Nirn there are more than just the two .**_

 _ **Nords , Redguards , Imperials and Bretons makes up the four races of man . Elves are called Mer here so there is Altmer ,Dunmer and Bosmer . Two of the mer races has been extinct or so they tell me , Dwemer and Falmer , though Helm has said that the Falmer hasn't actually been extinct , they just changed in time becoming wretched creatures living in the dark places of his homeland , the Dwemer has vanished without a trace . Then there are Orsimer , which are commonly known as orcs . For some reason they were once beautiful until some Demon came along that swallowed an elf and pooped it out or so one of the books I read says . The result was another Demon, or as they call them Deadra, called Malacath or something like that . So these Orsimer was born . I don't know if I should believe it or not .**_

 _ **The two Beast Folk races are of course Khajit , cat folk and Argonians , Lizard people .**_

 _ **When I first saw them I thought ABOMINATION ,but I learned quickly enough to realize that they weren't .**_

 _ **I work for a Khajit for crying out loud .**_

 _ **Life here is different than in Thedas . People seems a bit more relaxed , though some like the Altmer are stuck-up gits . The sky here is clean and there is no scar marring it .**_

 _ **Oh and guess what …Mages are free here .Yeah, you heard me . We're not locked up in towers and in each part of Cyrodil there are Guild houses that the College of Whispers or whatever are restoring , ,don't ask why the Guilds weren't in use before ,I obviously don't know, The other mage faction the Synod occupies their time in doing other things . They are mostly part of the Arcane University . K'Jeer had given me a few tomes on this land's magic and in some ways it is different ,but in others it is the same .**_

 _ **There are different schools of magic here . Conjuration , Destruction , Illusion , Alteration , Restoration . There used to be one more ,but K'Jeer said that it had merged with two of the other schools .**_

 _ **I've learned a bit of Restoration magic . Just a simple Healing spell , but I have used it and one of my scars , the one on my cheek , faded a little .**_

 _ **Parts of Cyrodil are cold and snowy like the Frostbacks . Bruma is the city there . This Bruma are bordering on a mountain range called The Jerells . There's a road through there that would take me to Skyrim if I so please to use it .**_

 _ **I can't wait to see this Skyrim for myself . The way the Nords talk about it ,it sounds like they truly love it .**_

 _ **I miss my home , Varric , but this place has become my home in this short few months since I have been here . I am free here . No Templars . No Chantry . No rebel mages . My list is long and I won't bore you with it .**_

 _ **I am alright . I live ,I breath , so you can tell him that I am okay , he don't have to worry about me .**_

 _ **I will write again when I can . There's a fleet of ships taking the voyage to Thedas every six months or so . I can't help it if it takes a year to sail between Tamriel and Thedas .**_

 _ **Six months to go there , six months to get back . It's an awful lot of sea to cover .**_

 _ **Anyway I am alright , Varric .**_

 _ **Love and greetings to all .**_

 _ **Carrie AKA Kiddo .**_

Varric stares at the letter that had arrived for him .

She wrote to him!.

He couldn't believe it . He was so , so happy to hear from her .

It's been more than a year now . Seventeen months to be exact , that he'd heard of her .The war against Corypheus are taking a bit longer for them than they thought and it wasn't over yet .Corypheus still needed to be defeated and even though it was nearing its end , there was still so much to do before they can get there .

He smiled at the way Kiddo seemed to be eager to get to that Skyrim place . It was as if he could see her face lit up with eagerness .

''I ,Varric , what are you so smiley about ?'', Bull's voice interrupts him .

Looking up he shrugs before handing over the letter to the big Quinari .

''She wrote to you ?'', he asks a few moments later , after he read the letter of course .

Varric nods grinning at him silently .

''She seems quite happy , don't you think ?''.

Varric nods again .

''If this war is over I am going there '', Bull says determinedly ,'' I want to see with my own eyes that she is alright , what do you say ,Varric , will you accompany me ?''.

Before Varric can answer a voice sounds up behind them asking ''Accompany you where ,Bull ?''.

It was the top man himself . The Inquisitor .

Varric and Bull becomes extremely nervous as they think of a way to keep this new information about his Kiddo away from him . He'd been quite obsessed of finding out where she'd sailed to .

''Err.. you see ,Inquisitor , we thought of going to …eh …Rivain when this is over '', Varric says looking far more guilty than he'd ever been in his life and that caused the Inquisitor to see right through him , but because he didn't want to pull it out of the dwarf he just snorts before walking away , causing the two to sigh in relief .

''Whew , that was close , Bully , I never want to be on his bad side , ever , so anyways , yeah I'll go with you , but first we really need to win this damn thing .''

Bull says nothing just watch as the Inquisitor walks through the door to the Smithy .

He hoped that the Inquisitor never finds out where Kiddo is because he would trample the poor girl .

''I said next Prisoner !'', the mean Captain snapped .

Carrie couldn't believe her bad luck . Her name hadn't been on the damn list and she'd been send to wait her turn while watching as they manhandled Ulfric Stormcloak cussing him out and gloating while he just stood there , silent as a mouse . Carrie didn't think that she could stay silent .

It had been awful to watch a stupid Nord walk over to be killed by way of beheading . She'd tried not to flinch when the axe fell . All the while there was this roaring noises that Carrie knew , because Thedas had things that made those noises . There was a dragon somewhere and these people seemed to ignore it as if it was just a breath of wind , though some did react , like the Captain , but the General had told them to continue the execution.

She hoped that the dragon didn't come there . She wouldn't love to see one . Not after Bull's tale about the one in the Hinterlands . She wanted to die like she was . Not going up in flames and burning to ash !.

''Prisoner to the block , nice and easy '', the young Nord who had the list says gently to her and she has no choice but to walk over .

She had a hard time not gagging at the sight of the other man's head in the crate and his blood on the block . The smell was something she'd smelled before , but it was still disgusting .

She felt a bit of pressure on her back and knew that the Captain was helping her kneel and lay down .

She breathed in through her mouth as the strong smell of the sticky blood that touched her cheek wafted up into her nostrils .

She lay there looking up at the headsman as he lifted his axe to swing it down . He never got the chance because just as he was about to swing his axe down a huge black beast came flying in , landing on the tower behind him , causing chaos and panic.

''Divines , what is that !'', someone calls .

''Dragon '', another answers .

Carrie would never forget the rush to get away from the beast as Ralof , the other blond that she'd shared a wagon with helped her up , calling for her to take the chance of escape .

In her heart she thanked the maker profusely as she followed Ralof into a tower where an unbound and no more gagged Ulfric stood waiting for them .

''Jarl Ulfric , was that a dragon ?, could the legends be true ?'', Ralof asks the man who stared at the girl instead of his comrade .

''Legends don't burn down villages '', Ulfric says in a voice that causes Carrie's knees to become a little weak , but not as much as the Inquisitor's voice used to .

''Are you serious ?, ''she asks quietly ,''dragons aren't legends , well , not my homeland's , at least ''.

Ralof and he looked at her frowning .

''High Rock has dragons ?, Impossible !'', Ralof snaps .

This causes Carrie to frown in turn . ''No , you're getting me wrong , I am not from this High Rock , I am from somewhere else , the far South to be exact , Thedas to be more than exact ''.

For a moment they just stare at her then Ulfric says ignoring what she'd just said ''We need to move , Now !, we won't get another chance ''.

''Up the tower '', Ralof says to Carrie ,taking her by the arm , leading her up there . They have to jump back when they reach halfway to the top because for some reason the dragon breaks a hole into the tower wall ,spewing in flames for good measure . The flames didn't reach her or the others , but the tower felt unusually hot ,making her sweat .

''Great , an escape route '', Ralof says when the dragon leaves to go bother someone else .

Carrie frowns at that as they walk up the stairs to check out the hole .

''See that Inn ?, jump over there and find a way to the Keep , I will follow when I can '', Ralof orders .

Rolling her eyes Carrie wonders if he thinks that she's some Rogue like Varric with the agility of a goat , but because she has no other way out she obeys and almost break her legs for her effort .

''Thanks a lot '', she grumbles as she limps to a hole in the floor wishing that there were stairs to walk down , but her bad luck still holds a little .

Jumping through the hole she grinds her teeth at the pain it unleashes on her sprained leg . This was going to be a real long and hard task . She hoped she survives this .

''Gerdur , Gerdur , I'm fine '', Ralof tries to assure his sister while Carrie stood by observing them .

She was tired , hungry and so dirty she thought that she'd never get clean again . It sucked .

She had found a way to the Keep and had to learn very quickly to use a sword because when she met up with Ralof inside the Keep they had to fight their way through Imperials and giant spiders to get out . She had to become a Rogue too and sneak past a damn sleeping bear , before they got out .

Ralof lead her to this little village called Riverwood , where his sister owns the Lumber mill. The village was inside of Imperial territory , but Ralof still came there anyway .

Carrie stood by listening as brother and sister spoke to each other about what happened in Helgen . Gerdur was shocked to hear about the dragon ,but seemed to believe her brother .

When she finally speaks to Carrie , she asks a favor that Carrie cannot refuse . She asks her to go to the City of Whiterun to ask for the Jarl's aid in case the dragon comes to attack Riverwood .

''I'll go at once '', she says ,nodding at Gerdur .

''Rest up a bit first , we'll be having dinner soon , you can go tomorrow morning '', Gerdur says .

Accepting the woman's suggestion she follows Ralof when he walks towards Gerdur's house . Whiterun wasn't going anywhere .

She lifted her hand to shoot sparks at the Giant man who were terrorizing some of the locals around the city of Whiterun's outskirts .

She had taken a short cut over rocks to walk through a small farm when she saw a group of three people fighting this Giant who looked nothing like Thedas' giants .

It looked more human than anything else !.

She decided to help out , but because she didn't want to waste arrows she threw spells at it hoping that it wasn't resistant to it .

It wasn't because it let out a roar of pain filled anger as it swung around to see who threw that spell giving a woman with red hair and skimpy armor the chance to pelt it with arrows while the other two people swung their blades at it .

Carrie had to duck as it swung its giant club made of some kind of bone at her . It missed her by an inch .

Readying flames in her hands she chugged that at him hoping that it would hurt a little more . She didn't bargain on its furry loincloth to burst into flames as the flames touched it . The Giant screamed in fear and pain as its ass was now on fire while arrows still cut into its back . He didn't know where to hit , or who to hit with its club . It was the only man in the group who gave it the deathblow and as it toppled over Carrie felt kind of sad that it was dead .

''Thanks for the help '', the red headed woman says swinging her bow over her shoulder .

Carrie nods while looking at the three people . They were clearly Nords if she had to go by how tall they were .

''We could use someone like you in the Companions , if you want to join go up to Jorrvaskr in the city , you would make a decent Shield Sister '', the redhead continues ,''I am Aela by the way ''.

''Carrie , my names Carrie , what's a Shield Sister ?''.

''Pleased to meet you , Carrie , a Shield Sister is someone who have your back in fights , you're not from around here are you ?''.

Carrie shakes her head at the redhead '' No , I am from far away , anyway I have to go , see you around , Aela ''.

Carrie wasn't sure why ,but the woman gave her the creeps .She just had to get away from her and fast .

Guards stops her when she finally reaches the city gate saying that the city was closed by order of the Jarl .

''Riverwood calls for the Jarl's aid '', she states hoping that , that would help her gain entry .

''Riverwood is in danger too ?, best to find the Jarl up in Dragonsreach , he'll want to know '', the Guard says changing his demeanor and opening the gate for her .

With a soft friendly smile she nods at him before walking into the city .

 _ **Dear Varric**_

 _ **I couldn't write for a while . Been busy .**_

 _ **I left K'Jeer and made my way to Bruma by Carriage . From there I had to walk .**_

 _ **Took me a week to get to the border and well end up walking into an Imperial Ambush .I was captured and thrown onto a wagon with three others .We rested the night under the stars watched by soldiers put out as guards . The next day we were carted off to a village called Helgen .**_

 _ **Varric I almost died there . They were going to execute me alongside the rebels they'd captured . I was never so happy in my life when a dragon attacked Helgen just as I laid down with my head on the block . I got a chance to escape .**_

 _ **I met the leader of the rebels personally . Shared a wagon with him . He has this cold demeanor . One of his soldiers and I escaped together and I had to learn how to use a sword very quickly as we fought through Imperials and giant spiders . Then I had to become a rogue by sneaking past a sleeping bear . That was a bit scary .**_

 _ **Helgen is destroyed . The dragon's work . He is an ugly big black one with red eyes . Sort of reminds me of Corypheus' dragon .**_

 _ **I was send to a nearby city to inform the Jarl there about this dragon and the Jarl gave me a set of armor and a sword for it , then I was send off on a quest by his Court Wizard Farengar Secret-Fire to a Nordic Tomb to find a Stone Tablet . Oh , Varric , it was scary going dungeon diving .**_

 _ **There were bandits , undead , the Nords call them Draugr and a giant spider . The Tomb stood on a mountainside and I had to fight off those bandits first . It's scary how one learns things so quickly under pressure .**_

 _ **After the bandits I found the spider harassing a lone bandit that was stuck in its web . Took me a while to kill ,but I got it right . That damn bandit ran when I freed him , straight into a group of three undead .**_

 _ **They were strong . Killed him instantly and then faced me . I wasn't sure if I would survive , though , here I am writing this down .**_

 _ **I searched the bodies and found gold , as well as a journal and a golden Dragon claw that turned out to be the key to the last chamber . In the last chamber I encountered a stone wall with glowing words on it as well as a strong Draugr who had the tablet .**_

 _ **After that when I went to sell my loot in Riverwood I found that , that claw actually belonged to the shopkeeper and that those bandits had stolen it from him . Gave me four hundred Septims for it . Sovereigns wouldn't be accepted here even if its gold . Anyway I then took the tablet back to Farengar after resting at Gerdur's house .**_

 _ **Gerdur is that rebel I escaped Helgen with Sister .**_

 _ **Farengar wasn't alone . There was a woman , hooded and armored with him .**_

 _ **I have just handed him the Stone tablet when Irileif , the Jarl's Houscarl , came running , calling for Farengar , telling him the Jarl wanted to see him and told me to come too .**_

 _ **Well , I killed my first dragon because of that . Its name was Mirmulniir .**_

 _ **The most oddest thing happened, Varric , as the dragon lay there dead its scales begun to burn away and well a sort of orange light rushed into me .**_

 _ **Oh , Varric , I was so scared when all of its memories and all that it was became sort of part of me .**_

 _ **One of the guards told me that I absorbed stole its power and I later heard it was actually its soul .**_

 _ **He told me that I am something called the Dragonborn and that I have the power to kill dragons permanently .**_

 _ **I didn't believe him until I ended up having to go to a monastery upon the tallest mountain in Skyrim called High Hrothgar and meet with a bunch of old bearded men in robes . Oh , little did I know that meeting them would end up in me having to go to a place to retrieve a horn of the first Greybeard , founder of The Way of the Voice . Anyway the horn wasn't in the tomb called Ustengrav . Someone stole it , leaving a note for me and I am currently on my way to Riverwood to find this person .**_

 _ **Well , that is how my life went until now .**_

 _ **Thank you for your letter . It was very helpful Varric . And I am glad that you and dearest Bull will be coming . I hope soon because I really , really need you guys .Thank Bull for his letter as well .**_

 _ **Love and Greetings to all**_

 _ **Kiddo .**_

 _ **P. S If this reaches you while you're already on your way to get here , sorry for taking so long !.**_

Varric smiled at the letter . He was glad to hear of her again . It had been almost two years . The war had been won and Solas had done something to get all the unstable magic out of the Inquisitors hand .

All that was left was a little stable magic , that wasn't a risk and a scar .

Cassandra had become the next Divine while Leliana stayed with the Inquisition that did nothing ,but repairs and kill off the remnants of Corypheus' forces .

Mostly everyone stayed . Even Josephine , though she won't be staying for much longer . She missed her homeland too much .

''Smiling again ?'', Bull asks like the previous time .

''I have another letter , Bull , Kiddo says we should hurry up and get there already ''.

Bull smiles , shaking his head at the excitement in Varric's voice .

''We should take him with us , you know '', he says to the Dwarf , ''it'll do him good , the Inquisition won't be needed much longer and he sorely needs a vacation , Cullen too , so do we all ''.

''Yeah , let's go find him , I saw him going to the war room a few minutes ago '', Varric says walking straight for the door that'll lead them there .

Carrie sighed in relief as she walked into Riverwood .

She'd had to catch a Courier to take a letter for her to Cyrodil and Captain Savellian . She didn't know if the letter would ever reach Varric , but she had hope that it would .

After handing over the letter she walked here . She hoped that whoever had the horn was here and didn't hide or anything .

She'd been walking hard to get here and she wasn't leaving without it .

The Sleeping Giant Inn wasn't very busy when she walked into it and a woman approached her just as she wondered who to ask for the so called attic room that didn't really exist .

''I am Delphine , can I help you ?''.

''I'd like to rent the attic room '', she says hoping that she's not making a fool of herself . Whoever had the horn might be laughing at her now as he or she watched .

''Attic room , eh ?, well we don't have an attic room ,but you can have the one to the left if you really want it for ten Septims ''.

Since she have nothing else to do she hands over to Delphine and walks to her room .

Not five seconds inside Delphine walks in and closes the door .

''So , you're the one the Greybeards had sent to retrieve the Horn of Jurgen Windcaller , I believe this belong s to you and before you say something , we cannot speak here , follow me to a more private place ''.

Carrie has no choice but to follow her into another room and finds that the wardrobe in the room isn't a wardrobe , it's a damn secret passage leading into the basement of the Inn where there's a table with a map on it as well as weapons and other essentials .

The setting was different , but if she closed her eyes she could picture another table and a map .

''So , you're the Dragonborn ?, can you really do it ?, I mean absorb a dragon's soul ?''.

''That's how I found out what I am , if you don't believe me I'll try and prove it to you , so anyway tell me what you want from me ''.

Delphine proceeds to tell her if she proves herself , she Delphine would answer all of her questions , so Carrie finds herself traveling with the woman to a place called Kyne's Grove where once again she meets that big black red eyed beast from Helgen ….

 ***Four years after leaving Skyhold ***

''This Vampire menace really needs to be dealt with '', a Guard grumbles to Carrie as she bend down to retrieve an arrow that she'd shot at a vampire who'd attacked a guard in Whiterun .

''I know and hopefully it shall be dealt with soon '', Carrie tells him.

She had been already contacted by a group of people called the Dawnguard who'd asked her to join , well , an Orc by name of Durak asked her .

''I hope you are right , Dragonborn , they just keep getting in here , harassing not only guards ,but also the town's people , say maybe you should join the Dawnguard , I am sure they'd like someone as strong and resourceful as you ''.

Carrie just inwardly rolled her eyes at him . She'd obviously join . Just like when she'd have to defeat Alduin two years prior .

Now that was some hard work . She even saw this Sovngarde that Ralof had spoken of . It had been so beautiful.

She'd help end the war against the Empire , became Thane of all Nine Holds and even joined some Factions , like the College of Winterhold since arriving in Skyrim .

It's been four almost five years since she'd left Skyhold and she'd proven to herself that she could do whatever it takes to become good enough for the people who thought her unworthy .

She'd been very busy .

Nodding goodbye at the Guard she heads to her very first house in all of Skyrim .Breezehome .She still didn't understand why it had such a name while it was actually warm inside and not all breezy .

Lydia her Housecarl was busy warming up some soup .

''Morning , My Thane , what was the commotion outside?''.

''A vampire terrorizing the Guards at the gate '', she answers stomping her boots clean on the rug at the door .

She was wearing a full set of Dragon Scale armor . She'd been lugging the bones and few remaining scales back because Eorlund Grey-Mane had told her that he could teach her to smith . She learned from the best in all of Tamriel and it resulted in her smithing a good quality armored set .

She didn't need to pay for her repairs because by learning she could do the repairs herself . She was better than that horrid Harrit of the Inquisition .

''I hate vampires '', Lydia says in a disgusted voice .

''Yeah , me too , they're nasty creatures ''.

She and Lydia dishes up some of the soup when it is hot enough .

''So ,when do you plan on joining the Dawnguard , My Thane ?'', Lydia asks when they're sitting down around the cooking pit .

''I want to go to Windhelm first , Wuunferth had asked for a few Alchemical ingredients , when I come back I'll go , why?, do you want to come too ? ''.

''No , My Thane , I'm just curious ''.

''Okay , if you change your mind ,just tell me when I leave ''.

Lydia just nods as Carrie gets up to walk to her room . She smiles at her Housecarl as ascends the stairs to the loft .

She'll get ready to leave for Windhelm soon ,for now she just wanted some sleep and to write a letter to her old friends.

 _ **HOPE YOU ENJOYED HUGS TO ALL READERS !.**_


	8. Chapter 8

His Heart

Chapter 8

The port of the City of Val Royeaux was bustling with activity .Ships of all sorts of sizes were laying on anchor and their crew were busy loading and unloading supplies and other wares .

''Why did we wait so long ?'', Varric grumbles as they board the ship to Tamriel ,''we should have gone there two years ago already ''.

''Because we had a lot of things to take care of , Varric , if you were so eager why didn't you just go there on your own ?'', Maxwell asks sharply . He really didn't need the dwarf's complains anymore . It was hard enough that he himself had been wishing to go two years ago ,but had to refrain because of all the work that still had to be done . Oh ,how he yearned for his beautiful Kiddo .

Rolling his eyes Varric walks towards the Captain who waited for them . They had booked passage on this return voyage two days ago . Varric got them a good deal on this ship . The Captain seemed to know the dwarf well . Probably because of getting letters from Kiddo .

''Ah , Master Thethras , I was beginning to think that you and your friends won't come '', he greets Varric while eyeing the others who hadn't come with Varric when he'd booked the passage , his eyes mostly on Bull who stood out because of being big and having horns . Almost like a Minotaur

''We had a bit of an issue , but all's good now , so , you said the ship leaves when ?''.

''In half an hour , Master Thethras , be sure to have lots of ginger handy , most people gets seasick and we still have a long way to go ''.

''Don't worry we all can handle it , have you got a letter for me ?''. He hadn't asked the Captain on the previous visit , he was too busy negotiating a deal . It must've also slipped the Captains mind .

''No , not this time , Master Thethras , but soon enough you'll see your friend , No ?''.

Varric nods ,though inside he's worried because he'd get a letter from Kiddo with each ship that sails from Tamriel .

 _Oh ,Kiddo , you better be alright ,_ he thinks as they are taken to their cabins .

They were going to have to share , two to a cabin , but it wasn't as if they never shared before . At least it wouldn't be tents anymore .

Maxwell makes the decision of who gets to share . Sera and Dorian were automatically put in one cabin as well as Solas and Cole . Varric and Bull decides to stick together while Vivienne and Josephine are being put in a cabin . Lastly Cullen and Blackwall are left and also the Inquisitor who opts to take one of the lone small cabins that has only one bunk in it . He needed his privacy as much as he could get it , Cullen didn't begrudge him that , neither the others . So Cullen and Blackwall decides to share .

After settling in Varric goes off to meet Helm who he had seen on one occasion when he'd come to get a letter . The old Nord was in the kitchen singing an old sailor song of bottles and whatnot .

''Ah , Master Thethras !'', he calls when Varric steps into the kitchen ,''you're finally going on a voyage to see my Home aren't you ?, you'll be visiting Carr and see if the boy is alright ?''.

''Yeah , took me long enough too because of some long standing business , but here I am and I am not getting off until I set foot in that country . Say , you don't need a hand sometimes do you ? I might just go stark mad if I don't do something sometimes on this voyage ''.

Helm smiled heartily at him , but shook his head ''I have a knew Cook's assistant , Boy from Hammerfell , his a good cook and he helps a lot , but , My friend , if you need some company sometimes just come an' visit me here ''.

Varric nods '' Will do ,Helm , I would like to hear stories 'bout your Homeland , if possible , I love a good story mostly ''.

''I'll tell you some , but not today , we'll be leaving soon , the open water calls and I am happy to go , old bones aren't what it used to be , might be my last voyage , might go home to Skyrim , though , Captain Savellian might just be sailing to Solitude in Skyrim because of a special delivery or something ''.

Varric smiles , nods and leaves . He'll be back later and then he'd probably hear more . Helm seemed to love to talk .

When the ship finally leaves Port all of them are on deck to say goodbye to their Home . They might not see it again for a long time .

''I am going to miss it '', Cullen breathes ,'' I never thought I'd feel sorry for leaving ''.

Nobody says something on that , too lost in their own thoughts .

Maxwell is somehow happy to see the last of Val Royeaux . He had no love for the city . He would miss Skyhold , though, it was his home for a long time . It had good and bad memories ,but he'd lived there and he won't ever forget the place that changed him.

The voyage's novelty wears of quickly in the first month as they sail through the open seas .

Sera gets seasick for the first week that goes by until she finds her so called 'sea legs'.

Cole learns about sailing from a boy who takes him under his wing . The boy didn't even know that Cole wasn't really fully human and Cole didn't tell him it either afraid to be rejected once someone found out .

Cullen and Blackwall spars in the mornings ,entertaining the Ship's crew who was starved for some entertainment .

Bull and Varric mostly are seen with Helm or any of the Crew who would tell them about Tamriel . They seemed to find the First Mate ,an Orc by name of Mac gro-Azgru fascinating . They have never seen one of the big green tusked men of Orsinium before and learned much from him as the days passed . They also saw other races like Bosmer and Dunmer . They were all quite fascinating . The crew found Bull equally fascinating , with his horns and the tattoos on his arms and chest .

Solas wandered the ship always trailed by a young Bosmer who'd taken a liking to this strange 'Mer' with his bald head and silvery grey eyes . Solas didn't mind the odd looking Elf with his tanned skin and dark eyes . He wanted to know about the elvhen of the far North .

Vivienne and Josephine kept to themselves mostly as they didn't know these people . Josephine was a bit scared of the Dunmer , having thought that he was some kind of Abomination until Varric told her what Kiddo had said about them .

Maxwell wandered the ship on his own , breathing in the sea air , feeling more alive than he'd ever felt . He dreamed up scenarios of when he meets his little Heart for the first time again and of how they'd spend time together . Being away from her hadn't changed his feelings , made it more mature ,yes , but nothing more .

The days flew by endlessly it seemed , the voyage becoming a bit tiresome with each month that passes by . Seeing nothing but water and sky didn't help their moods either and so they begun to wish for it to end .

Six months later their wish are fulfilled when someone from the Crow's nest yells that land is ahead and they finally sees Cyrodil in all its glory , much like Carrie had years ago .

''We'll be docking at Anvil for supplies and then we'll be off for Solitude '', the Captain tells them .

He had told them that they needn't go by land to reach Carrie's new home , he'd take them as far as Solitude .

They were glad for that help. They wouldn't have wanted the hassle of having to hire a carriage to Bruma and walk from there .

Carrie sighed in relief as she steps through the gates of Windhelm , the city of the new High King .

She'd been send by the High King's Steward Jorleif to kill some bandits in a nearby cave and had been successful in this endeavor . One of the Bandits had been a vampire and had been hard to kill , but she had won the fight in the end , but not before she got a cut on her arm by one of the other's who turned out to be a thrall .

 _And to think that I only came to see Wuunferth ,_ she thinks as she nods in greeting at one of the guards patrolling the city . The guard nods back without saying a word . Carrie don't mind that because she didn't want to talk either .

She shivers slightly as an icy wind blows against her . Windhelm was never a pleasant place to be at . She'd found this out on her first visit , months after Ralof had told her to join the Stormcloaks .

She nodded another greeting at a dirty beggar woman who didn't even want to take any work Carrie had offered her in the past . She liked to keep living the lazy life , begging on the streets of Windhelm .

Carrie mentally shakes her head at that . She would've taken job offers any time if she was in that woman's shoes .

The woman nods back and ask ''Could you spare a coin for an old beggar ?''.

Carrie sighs inwardly , but takes out two coins to hand to her , before quickly moving on towards the Palace of Kings that stood tall and impressively solid grayish black against the sky and snow covered ground .

It was warm inside as she stepped through one of the heavy doors that sealed off the inhabitants from the outside cold cruel world .

The Palace's Great Hall greeted her with its blue rug covered stone floors , food laden table and impressive throne at the far wall .

On the throne sat the High King, wearing the Jagged Crown , talking to his Housecarl and Steward alike about something .

Carrie waited back politely as they spoke until the Steward broke away from the conversation , giving her the chance to intercept him and tell him about her success . A few minutes later she leaves the Palace with a much heavier coin pouch .

When she leaves the city a few more minutes later after selling some loot a courier intercepts her to hand her a letter from a man in Riften who asks specifically for her help and because it is near Riften she decides to give Fort Dawnguard a visit .

''So this is Solitude , huh ?'', Varric asks Helm who grunts in answer .

''I didn't think it'll look so , well, civilized '', he admits .

''Nobody ever thinks that Solitude , or Skyrim in general is civilized , like some Nords used to say 'the Empire thinks us all Lawless beasts ', but we aren't lawless or uncivilized , anyhow , I bid you a fair stay in this land and may you be prosperous in finding your young friend ''.

With that Helm leaves them to walk through Solitude alone .

They'd docked that morning and had helped to unload some things , before they'd trudged up the path to the city that stood on a cliff .

''Where do we ask for Kiddo first ?'', Cullen asks as they look around at the city and its people , who in return looked at them as they passed them by , staring long at the horned Quinari .

''We should make our way to Whiterun , I think, Kiddo might be there , or if you want we can ask a guard where we can find someone who could take a letter to Kiddo, or we can explore and hope we find her on our own '', Varric offers.

''Let's first find some accommodation for the night '', Maxwell says taking up his old role as leader of the group ,''then we can plan ''.

They ask a guard for directions to an Inn and he points them to the Winking Skeever .

''Thanks , we owe you one '', Varric tells the guard .

''It is my duty to help a stranger , Friend , come find me if you need any more help '', is all the guard says .

The Winkng Skeever was warm and full of candlelight with tables and rugs occupying the floor space in front of a counter where the Innkeeper stood cleaning mugs .

Maxwell and Cullen stepped towards the counter while the rest just found some seats at a large enough table to accommodate them all .

''Good day , Strangers , what can I do for you ?'', the Innkeeper asks in a friendly tone while eyeing the newcomers with interest .

''Some food would be nice , Serrah, and some room , if you got it '', Maxwell says looking at the man in his simple Inn keeping uniform which consisted of a sackcloth shirt , an apron and brown pants .

The Innkeeper who'd never heard the word 'Serrah ' before frowns at this odd word that sounded more like a woman's name , but thinking of the coin he'd be losing if he turns these foreigners away , he says a bit less friendly ''Food I have and some clean rooms for the weary , but it'll cost you ''.

''We have coin '', Cullen counters coldly , not liking the Innkeepers tone of voice .

''Alright , Friend , I mean no harm , anyway please take a seat while I go get the menu and I'll go ready some beds ''.

A few minutes later they eat their bellies full with food and drink that they've never really tasted before , except on the ship maybe , in small portions because of the rationing .

Maxwell had asked the Innkeeper if there was a courier or messenger that could take a letter for them to Kiddo and the Innkeeper had nodded telling them that he himself could go find one for them because there was one living in Solitude .

Varric was tasked in writing the letter and was told not to mention all of them to Kiddo . He did in any case write to her , though , that not just him and Bull had come . After eating they were taken to their rooms and found that there were two beds to a room and three in one room so they had to share again . Maxwell decides to share with Bull and Varric who welcomes him with open arms .

Isran was a Redguard with anger issues it seemed to Carrie when she first set eyes on him .

She'd finished the job for the noble in Riften and had come straight to the Fort , meeting a young Nord named Angmaer on the way who also wanted to join . They were the first two ' true ' recruits . A young woman who had learned to fight fiercely in this land of the Nords and a man who only kept wolves away with his 'Pa's axe' as he himself had said to Isran who'd laughed at him .

 _Some pair we make ,_ Carrie had scoffed in her mind while she'd listened to Isran give the young man some pointers in shooting a Crossbow .

She already had a task , given to her by Isran and a Vigilant of Stendarr named Tolan , but she wanted to stay a few moments longer to help Angmaer in his nervousness . She'd have loved support when she'd joined the Companions years ago . She only had herself , walking into Jorrvaskr alone .

After it was clear that Angmaer would be alright she'd left to see to her task and that was to find out what the Vampires wanted from Dwimhollow Crypt which was situated near Morthal and not far from the destroyed Hall of the Vigilantes .

It was on the road to Morthal a day or two later , that she met a merchant in trouble . His wagons had broken down and his men lay dead all around him because of bandits who now also lay dead , slain by Carrie who was helping the merchant repair the wagon wheel .

''Could you help me to get to Solitude ?'', the merchant , a tall lanky Nord in fine clothes asks her when she dusts off her hands indicating that she's finished with the repairs .

''I could , but I am already late for an appointment in Morthal '', she says , not wanting to tell him that she was actually on her way to Dwimhollow Crypt .

Looking at her pleadingly he says ''I'll write a letter to the person who you're going to meet up with , I can also pay you for your service ,I …''.

She halts him right there stating ''Alright , no need to plead , I'll help you and you don't have to pay me ,come on , let's leave , we don't know what else lurks around ''.

With that she gets up onto the driving seat of the wagon and gives him a pointed look indicating for him to also get onto the wagon . He obeys . Thankfully . She'd have left him there if he hadn't .

 _I should've brought Shaddowmere ,_ she grumbles inwardly as she holds onto the reigns , _would've been much faster ,less uncomfortable ._

''So what do I call you ?'', the man asks trying to make small talk while they're in each other's company .

''Carrie , and you ?''.

''Jormund Tall-Axe at your service '', he says smiling at her .

She nods keeping a straight face , not in the mood to smile , her Dragon blood boiling inside of her .

The road to Solitude is fairly devoid of any danger and they make it in record time . Carrie is glad to be rid of the merchant who had asked her so many questions her head begun to ache . She'd have strangled him if Solitude hadn't loomed up in front of them around a bend .

She decides to go in to get a drink at the Inn . She'll leave in the morning for Dwimhollow , it isn't like it is going anywhere anytime soon .

The city is quiet at this hour of the day , it being almost closing time for most shops , as she walks through the gates . A guard on duty at the gates greets her respectfully , knowing who she is . She returns the greeting with a friendly one of her own before heading towards the Winking Skeever ,ignoring a drunk dancing man outside of it .

 _Evette San should really take better care of dear old Dad ,_ she muses as she passes him .

Inside was warm and full of light as she steps through the doors . A few people looks up and calls a friendly greeting as she walks up to the counter .

''Ah , good evening , Carrie , how goes the adventuring ?!'', Corpulus Vinius , the Innkeeper calls smiling broadly .

''Good evening to you too , Corpulus , the adventuring goes alright , what's on the menu tonight ?''.

Her voice was quiet and she sounded tired .

''Rabbit stew, bread ,cheese , snowberry pie , sweetrolls and some good old Black-Briar mead to wash it down with ''.

''I'll…'', she begins but froze as she hears a very familiar voice somewhere in the room telling a tale of Thedas . Turning around she scans the room briefly before her eyes lands on a blond head of a very short stocky man ,Varric Thethras in all his glory . Turning back to a confused Corpulus she says hastily ''I'll take the stew and sweetrolls with the mead '', then she walks with determined steps towards the dwarf hoping that he won't see her until she gets there .

''-and the Inquisitor just threw out his arm with such fierceness cutting down the High Dragon , I thought I was going to crap myself with fear '', Varric tells his audience of two Nords and an Imperial .

''Sure and my name is Sanguine '', one unbeliever snorts causing Varric to glare at him .

''I shit you not , My Good Man , I was there , I helped fighting that Dragon ''.

''And he tells tall tales again '', a voice says in amusement from behind him , while a hand slaps his shoulder lightly .

He have to suppress the urge to jump in fright before his brain registers that he in fact knows that voice even if he hadn't heard it for a while .

With hope in his eyes he turns himself in his chair to look up at the person who stood behind him .

His eyes widens as they meet familiar Caramel colored eyes . Well, something in the eyes was familiar , but they were also a bit different , a bit fiercer than he'd remembered .

''Kiddo ?'', he asks as hope flares up a little more .

A smile breaking into a war painted face is all answer he needs to get up and throw his arms around the young woman who he hadn't seen for four almost five years .

For a moment he feels her stiffen before rather strong arms wraps around him as she returns the hug .

They hug only for a few moments , reveling in the nearness of very old friends , before she pulls back first ,pushing his arms from around her waist , standing back to look down at him .

He was a bit older, Obviously , but he seemed also thinner as if he hadn't eaten much for months .

He watched her as she did him , taking in the odd looking armor, made of bone , and the shorter braided hair , as well as the war paint on her face .

What caught his eyes the most was the weapons she wore .

A war hammer on her back along with a bow and quiver and a shield . On her sides a dagger or two and a mean looking sword .

''Well , you definitely look different , Kiddo , not like the sweet girly girl you used to be '', he remarks .

''And you are still you , except you are older and thinner looking , Varric Thethras Rogue , Storyteller and Unwelcome tagalong '', she snarks causing him to roll his eyes .

''Yeah , yeah , man can't always stay young , Kiddo , so anyway wanna see the others ?, I am sure Bull would like to…''.

''Which others , Varric ?, who else came ?'', she interrupts him feeling a bit of fear as well as something else dancing inside her stomach .

Glaring at her for interrupting him he snaps ''Would you give me a chance to speak !''.

Feeling her Dragon blood boiling inside of her she has to fight the urge to snap back , so before she can do that she turns on her heel to walk back towards the Innkeeper who'd heard and seen everything that had gone on between the two .

''I'll be going , Corpulus , give the food to someone else ''. She throws a coin pouch with more coin than the food costs on the counter before storming out of the Inn .

Varric stands there speechless for a few seconds before he too moves off towards the doors in a hurry . He just couldn't leave her like that . He came here to see her , not to fight with her .

What he finds outside isn't something he'd ever thought to see . There were three guards fighting a red eyed woman and not far from them Carrie fought a red eyed man and an ugly black dog with red eyes and teeth as long as he'd never seen .

Pulling Bianca from his back he decides to help . That is all he can do .

Taking steady aim at the dog he pulled the trigger and a bolt shoots out straight towards it , imbedding itself into the dog's skull killing it instantly .

He didn't see the second dog that was behind him until the dog's teeth bit into his shoulder . He let out a piercing scream of agony causing everyone who hears it to grow cold .

Carrie who just finished off her opponent froze for a moment in shock and fear before she swings around to see who screamed . She grows hot , then cold as she sees her friend 's predicament and without thinking on it she unsheathes her one dagger , throwing it at the dog's head . Luckily for her it strikes true , unlucky for the dog his skull is pierced and he falls limply to the ground next to the short man who stood there for a few seconds before his eyes rolls back into his head and he falls over just to be caught by Carrie who put on a burst of speed with the help of a Thu'um to get to him .

She quickly felt for a pulse , sighing in relief when she feels it . Without thinking twice she hauls him up into her strong and capable arms , buckling slightly under his weight, and carry him into the Inn.

''Corpulus , I need a healer !'', she calls ,''Vampires attacked and he was bitten by a Death Hound !''.

Corpulus quickly sends off a boy to go find a healer before he beckons for Carrie to follow him to a room .

''He is sharing with two others , they're probably there , these people have been here for two days , none of them came out of their rooms much , not even the man with the funny hat '', he explains as he pushes open a door to a room with three beds in it .

A gasp from a table in the corner of the room tells her that the room was indeed occupied , but by more than just two more people .

She didn't spare them a glance just asks '' Which bed does he use ?''.

'' The bed next to the window '', a very familiar deep voice answers causing her to look up briefly , her Caramel gaze meeting an Emerald gaze . She saw recognition in those eyes , but it quickly vanished replaced by something else that she didn't want to contemplate on right now .

Huge hands pulls Varric from her grasp and the moment of looking into the Inquisitor's eyes passes as her attention turns to the owner of the hands ,which is none other than Bull .

'' What happened ?'', another voice asks .

She knew that one too and turns her gaze upon the tall bald headed elf .

''We fought Vampires and he got bitten by a Death Hound , Corpulus has send for a healer ''.

Her voice is toneless as if she is reading something from a paper .

She moves to stand next to Bull who starts peeling off Varrics Dustcoat and tunic .

''Careful , it may cause more bleeding '', she warns him in the same tone .

Bull looks at her briefly before nodding ''I know , but we need to look at the damage , Kiddo ''.

Her eyes widens slightly . He knew who she is .He too had recognized her .

''Probably bad , Bull , a Death Hound's bites are like pouring fiery ice into ones veins , ask me , I have been bitten once by one , it didn't live long , I broke its jaw ''.

Her voice was still toneless and almost starts to grind on Maxwell who can't keep his eyes off of her' nerves .He has to bite down hard not to scream at her for sounding so emotionless .

The others stares at her in shock . How can a person talk of killing as if it was just the weather they were referring to .

''There's no blood '', Bull states a second or so after she spoke .

''Of course , Bull, didn't I tell you ?, it freezes the blood in the veins , the bite of a Death Hound that is ''. A little bit more of emotion . Anger ,or exasperation , none could tell .

The door opens for a second time and a man wearing orange robes walks in followed by the Innkeeper .

''This is Turius , the new priest at the Temple of the Divines '', Corpulus introduces ,''he knows much about healing , Carrie ''.

'' I need most of you out of the room , '' the man takes charge before Carrie or anyone else can utter a word of greeting ,''only one or two can stay , choose quickly because I shall be needing those two's help ''.

''I shall stay '', Carrie says quickly before anyone can open their mouths ,'' and Solas can stay , he knows much of healing too ''.

The others says nothing , knowing that if they wanted Varric to survive , arguing with Kiddo or the Priest won't help ,so they walk out like good little boys and girls , but not without taking one last look at Kiddo and the injured dwarf on the bed , their eyes lingering more on Carrie than Varric . Especially the Inquisitor's eyes .

He just couldn't get enough of her .

 _ **SORRY FOR TAKING LONG AGAIN . NO INTERNET . HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS ONE .**_


	9. Chapter 9

HIS HEART

Chapter 9

''She looks different '', Cullen says as they waited outside in the Common room of the Inn while the healer worked on their dwarf friend ,''Kiddo I mean , did you see how strong she looks ?, in Thedas she'd never have been able to carry Varric like that ''.

''Yeah , Cullen , but you read her letters that we've shown you , the girl has Dragon blood in her veins '', Bull grumbles .

Maxwell listens quietly to their conversation as he thinks of the young woman that was inside the room where Varric was being treated .

He didn't know what to think of how she looked . He had seen the blood spattered armor . The war paint on her face . The fierce glint in her eyes .

He had heard that monotonous voice . It wasn't different from a Tranquil , but she didn't have the brand so she wasn't Tranquil . She wasn't the same ,though . Cold ,yes , cold as if her heart was as hard as ice .

She had shown no emotion when their eyes had met . No recognition , though he knew she recognized him like he did her .

His heart had started to flutter when he'd looked into those Rich Caramel eyes and he'd felt suddenly alive like only she could make him feel , but only for that moment because then she'd turned her attention away from him and he felt half dead again and his heart felt like breaking .He had wanted her to look at him like she used to ,when he'd felt uncomfortable and hadn't found his feelings for her yet .Like the time before he actually started talking to her .

''Why hadn't it shown then when we were up against Corypheus' dragon in Haven ?, why didn't she feel it then ?, her letters told that whenever a dragon was near , she could feel it ''. It was Dorian who too wanted to know .

''Maybe it was the corruption of its blood or something '',Bull says trying to make a good case for the girl who wasn't a girl anymore .She was a woman , beautiful and strong .

''Or maybe she is fibbing '', Sera says from where she sat on a chair rubbing her tummy 'cause she was hungry . She was always hungry .

''Sure and I am a Tamasrin '', Bull snorts . He was so sure Carrie wasn't lying . He could smell that odd dragony scent on her when he had taken Varric from her .

''Alright , Darlings , let's not fight over who is right , Varric needs us to be strong '', Vivienne says getting tired of the discussion .

Maxwell felt something like gratefulness towards the Mage . He also was getting tired of it . He didn't want to hear anyone slander his little Love even if he himself wasn't sure if what she wrote to Varric was true .

He wanted to believe , but there were so many things that just didn't add up , like what Dorian said , she hadn't felt the dragon of Corypheus .

Carrie poured most of her magic into Varric's body praying to Talos that it would be enough .

The young woman ignored the tall bald elf that stole glances at her as they bend over the dwarf alongside the Priest Turius .

It wasn't that she didn't want to acknowledge him , it was just that she needed to focus and Solas was a bit distracting with his glances .

It was an hour before Varric's wound was healed , but there would be a scar on his shoulder , reminding him of his ordeal . He was still unconscious , but they had hope that he'll wake soon and then he needed to rest up for two maybe three days . Carrie planned on staying to check that he did indeed rest .

''Thank you ,Father Turius '', she tells the Priest , handing him a coin pouch for his services . He gives her a small smile before packing up his things and leaving .

Carrie turns back to the bed bending to look at the scar that was left .It was ugly , but smaller than it would've been if they hadn't acted with magic . She would write to Enthir at Winterhold College to send her one of those salves that he had that takes away scars . She didn't want Varric to suffer such a memory .

''Should I call the others ?'', she hears Solas asks .

She shrugs ''Do what you must '', she says her voice back to its toneless state . Solas didn't understand why it was so , but he knew it had something to do with his and the other's presence.

He leaves ,but comes back immediately with the others in tow . They must've seen the Priest leave .

She only looked at them briefly before she turned back to Varric , pulling the covers over him with gentle hands .

After doing that she picks up his Dustcoat and Tunic . She'll take them to the tailors for fixing , until then she'd have to find something that he could wear .

She made to leave , but Bull's huge frame moved to block the door and she suddenly realized that she won't be able to leave if she didn't speak to him or the others .

She sighs ,letting Varric's clothes fall to the floor and holding her hands up in a defensive way ,''Bull , it is late and I don't want trouble , we can speak in the morning ''.

''No , we talk, Now '', the Inquisitor says firmly ,''Varric came here to visit you , as did we all ,you cannot dismiss us as if we are common little boys and girls .''

Carrie sighs again ,rubbing her temples as a headache is slowly forming .She didn't need to be reminded why Varric was here . Why the others was here . She had wanted this after all . She just didn't think that the Inquisitor would come too .

 _I should've known that he would ,_ she thinks .

''I don't have time for this , Inquisitor , I said that I'll come back in the morning , I give you my word '', she says tiredly .

''And I said we talk now !'' , he roars his face scrunching up in anger .

Carrie glared at him anger boiling up inside of her at the way he tried to dominate her . She wasn't one of his team anymore . He couldn't come here and push his will upon her like that .

He glares back unwaveringly . He wasn't going to budge . He have waited so long to see her again and now she just wanted to walk out on them without speaking with them or him first . He was going to make her stay even if it was the last thing he do .

Carrie sighs once more after a few seconds of glaring at him . She wasn't in the mood to fight anyone right now and she was bone tired , having been on the road for almost two days to get to Morthal and then eventually Dwimhollow Crypt .

Bending down to pick up Varric's clothes again she says ''I am not going anywhere , Inquisitor , just to my house and tomorrow when the shops open to the tailors , Varric's clothes needs mending ,obviously and the tailors are closed at this hour , I also need to inform my Housecarl that I am here as well as Jarl Elisif , I am after all a Thane of Haafingar , I will be back tomorrow , you can count on it ''.

He didn't believe her . She could see it in those Emerald eyes that had once made her knees feel like jelly and still does .

He kept glaring at her and she was becoming a bit irritated at that . Tension builds up as they silently stares at each other , neither one wanting to budge .

She shook herself mentally as her Dragon begins to stir inside . She didn't want to show her inner Dragon right now .

The sound of Varric beginning to wake , breaks the eye contact as Carrie turns towards the bed as the dwarf lets out a soft groan .

Letting his clothes fall once again she rushes towards the bed to help her slightly disorientated friend to sit up .

''Welcome back to the land of the living , Varric '', she says , a smile breaking over her face .

The first smile Maxwell had seen for a long time coming from her . He wasn't sure if he should feel jealous that it wasn't directed at him ,or not .

''Oh , I feel like I've been trampled by a Giant '', Varric groans ,holding onto Carrie's arm because he felt a little dizzy .

''You should be glad it wasn't a Giant . Skyrim Giants have Mammoths and Mammoths helps their masters when there is a fight , Varric , anyway you had a bad run-in with a damn Death Hound and could've died , I am just glad you didn't ''.

Varric says nothing on that he was just glad that she seemed to have forgiven him for snapping at her earlier that night .

What he did say was that he was hungry and Carrie left with Bull to go find him some food . Bull was to keep an eye on her , to make sure she didn't leave the Inn .

Carrie didn't like that ,but endured it for Varric's sake . She brought food back for everyone and they ate in silence .

There was still a little tension between the Inquisitor and her ,but for Varric's sake they let their short spat slide for now . They might have a battle of wills again sometime , but Carrie hope they didn't . She wasn't his to command anymore and she was stronger than the coward that had fled Skyhold .She couldn't let him walk over her now that she was so independent .

She and Bull , again keeping an eye on her of course, took back their plates later . He was silent like he'd been earlier when he'd accompanied her , but she could see behind his keen eyes that he was bursting with questions . She wasn't going to answer questions when he eventually asked . Right now she just wanted to get out of there and the only way she could do that is if she used some of her abilities .

She knew that if she used her Thu'um the guards would be breathing down her neck ,yet she had no other choice , because she wasn't about to let the Inquisitor win this round . No , she needed to leave and using a Thu'um would be best .

Her chance comes when Evette San's father comes through the door .

Carrie gives Bull a grin before using Become Ethereal , so that he couldn't touch her .

'' **Feim Zii Gron !'',** it echoed and she had to suppress a laugh at Bull's priceless expression as she saluted him before rushing for the door that Evette's father in his drunken state didn't close .

She almost felt giddy with relief as she ran down the streets towards Proudspire Manor , that was situated beside the Bards College .

She sobered as the consequences of her action hit her . She was free , yes , but the Inquisitor was going to be furious .

Maxwell was beyond reasonably furious after Bull told him what had happened . He couldn't believe she tricked them like this .

As he stared at a sleeping Varric he wondered if Carrie was going to come back in the morning as she'd promised .

He wanted to go out there and find her and when he does find her he wanted to wring her neck for running . He wanted to talk to her , in private if possible, about that day she left Skyhold and about how she felt about him now .

He still felt for her like he'd felt then . His love for her didn't fade . He wanted to hold her and he wanted to kiss her . He'd forgiven her for leaving , he didn't know if he could forgive her now for running and undermining his authority . He was the man after all and she ..she was the woman . A bit sexists he knew , but still he needed to keep her with him now . He didn't want to lose her again now that he found her .

Morning broke fresh and beautiful as Carrie stirred awake in her bed . She wasn't one to sleep in . Never did and never would .

She got out of bed , rubbing sleep out of her eyes and donned her armor . She would go check up on Varric then take his clothes to the Radiant Raiment to have Taarie fix his Dustcoat and Tunic , until it was fixed she'd have to buy him something else to wear, though she wasn't sure if she would find something .Varric was so short and stocky .

Jordis , her Houscarl , had been surprised to see her the previous night , asking what she was doing there . She had explained to her , everything . Jordis had then prepared her a bath and after the bath Carrie had gone to bed , with hope in her heart that the Inquisitor won't be too angry .

She'd pushed such thoughts away because she'd reminded herself that he held no jurisdiction over her and so had no right to be angry .

She still loved him , though , after everything .

''My Thane I made some stew '', Jordis says when she walks down the stairs .

''Thanks , Jordis , '' she says accepting a bowl of Horker stew from the Nord .

''You're welcome , My Thane ''.

They ate discussing the day in between bites . After breakfast Carrie knew that she couldn't postpone any longer so she walked out of her house , taking in the sweet scent of the flowers and fresh baking bread as she headed down the road towards the Winking Skeever .

Corpulus greeted her with a friendly smile as she stepped through the door . Early morning drinkers were already sat at the tables , drinking mead and eating what was on the morning menu .

''Are my friends still here ?'', she asks the Innkeeper , who nods . With a quiet thanks she walked towards the corridor with closed doors and banged on one .

Bull answered immediately , staring at her with a surprised look on his face as she pushes past him .

Varric was sitting up in bed rubbing his eyes and the Inquisitor was seated at the table in the corner , eating some stew from a bowl . The latter got up immediately when he saw her while the former calls a soft 'good morning' to her which she return with a smile .

''Well , what do you know , the little runner returns '', Maxwell remarks sarcastically .

Ignoring his jibe she walks to where Varric's clothes lay, now neatly folded on a chair , picking it up .

''I am going to Radiant Raiment , if one of you want to accompany me , I won't mind '', she states casually .

Maxwell , knowing that this is his chance to be alone with her says ''I'll go ,we've been cooped up enough ''.

Carrie nods in his direction and is about to walk out of the room again when Varric asks ''Hey , have anyone seen Bianca ?''.

Carrie felt a surge of relief when she stepped out of the Inn , Maxwell following closely .

She had , had to promise Varric to look for his 'Bianca' . He'd looked possibly devastated about losing his trusty weapon . After the events of the previous night she hadn't had a thought of picking up his Crossbow when she had rushed him inside the Inn .

''We'll ask some of the guards if they haven't seen it '', she says to Maxwell as they make their way down the road towards the nearby tailors .

''I just hope we find her ,Varric would be very sad if we don't '', he comments .

Sparing him a glance she nods . There was nothing else she could do .

Taarie and her sister was already busy with some work when they step through the doors .

''Ah , morning , how may I help you ?'', Taarie's sister Endarie asks amiably as they step up to the counter .

Carrie places Varric's Dustcoat and Tunic on the counter and explain what had happened . Endarie promises to mend it , if she can . After that Carrie asks her if she had any tunics laying around that would fit a small stocky person .

Giving her an odd look she shakes her head and Carrie , who knew that , that was true left frowning , with Maxwell quietly trailing her .

''Let's find Varric's Bianca , then we can look for something that he can wear '', he offers .

Nodding she walks back to the gates , greeting a guard with a friendly smile . One that Maxwell didn't want her to waste on a guard .

''Have you seen an odd looking Crossbow by any chance ?'', she asks the guard .

''Jorlik , one of the guards that were on duty last night mentioned Octieve San carrying some kind of Crossbow towards the blacksmith , he said that he was going to sell it , why ?''.

Carrie sighs before explaining the whole thing to the guard of the Vampire attack and Varric getting hurt .

After that she leads Maxwell towards the Blacksmith who's wife owned Bits and Pieces .

''I hope he still has it '', she tells Maxwell as they walk .

''I hope so too , imagine Varric having to use something else when we don't find Bianca , it won't be the same, anyway who is this Octieve San ? ''.

Carrie looked up at the man who walked beside her , she couldn't believe how easily the two of them fell into conversation . ''Some city drunk , he always begs for some coin to buy drinks with , and he always stands outside the Winking Skeever dancing and drinking ''.

Meeting her eyes he smiles that sexy smile she'd been dreaming of for so long and she can't help but smile back causing him to halt , surprised that she'd even smile at him. He never thought that she would ever smile at him again .

''Beirand , have you received a strange looking Crossbow by any chance ?'', Carrie asks , hoping beyond hope that they weren't too late .

''I might have , why ?'', the former Imperial Legion Blacksmith asks .

 _Oh , this is becoming old fast ,_ Carrie thinks before explaining to him about what had occurred .

''Well, then , I have paid a thousand Septims for it and I can't let you just have it '', he says obstinately .

Rolling her eyes mentally Carrie pulls out a heavy coin pouch , handing it to him .''Two Thousand Septms , for the amount you paid and a little bit of profit , what say you ?, will you give it back ?''.

With a half hearted grumble he walked over to a chest and pulled out Bianca who seemed cleaner than Carrie had ever seen her before .

''You should tell your friend that I would like to see him about maybe getting schematics for this Crossbow , if I could mass produce , he can make a fine profit ''.

''I'll tell him , but I don't think he'll bite , Beirand ''.

With that she takes the Crossbow , taking her leave quickly as if afraid that Beirand would want it back .

''Man , am I glad that we got her back '', she tells the Inquisitor who smiles at the way her eyes shines with child-like happiness .

''Did you have to pay him Two Thousand coins for it , though?, I mean it was stolen goods ''.

He sounded serious as well as concerned .

''He wouldn't have given it back any other way , In…'', she begins but he interrupts her .

''My name is Maxwell, Kiddo , I may still be Inquisitor in Thedas , but here I am a nobody , so it's Maxwell and nothing more ''.

Frowning at him slightly she nods ''Alright ,….M..Maxwell '', she stutters his name feeling her cheeks warm like it used to and she feels like kicking herself for that weakness .

He just smile at that feeling sort of happy that he still could make her stutter when he was near her . Showed that she wasn't completely unaffected by his presence.

''Wow , she's so clean !'', Varric exclaims looking at Bianca with admiration in his eyes .

''Yeah , I suppose Beirand cleaned her , he had asked for schematics ,but I am not sure if you should give him some , anyway keep her safe she's cost a small fortune , stupid Octieve San went and sold her for drinking money , Beirand is a stubborn old fool , wouldn't have budged if we didn't pay him , just be glad it wasn't Eorlund Grey-Mane , would never have gotten her back from _him_ , ''Carrie rambles on her face growing dark at the mention of Octieve San . It spelled nothing good for the poor sod . Varric could see that .

He gulped and nodded . He would try and keep Bianca safe .

''So , what is on the agenda today ?'', Blackwall asks , speaking for the first time since seeing Carrie again .

Carrie looks at him saying ''I'm due to see the Jarl of Haafingar , so I have to be on my way now to the Blue Palace , if anyone of you fancy coming along , you better come now , just keep your weapons sheathed and be on your best behavior , guards have thrown people into jail for lesser crimes than just bumping into someone accidentally , oh and Varric , rest today , tomorrow you may be able to leave your bed ''.

Varric does something Carrie had never seen him do before . He POUTS!. That causes her to feel very guilty in having to leave him there and she can't help but sigh and say ''Alright , but you need something to wear , Master Thethras , you could get arrested for flashing all that …err …chest hair ''. She blushes as she stumbles over the last two words .

''Oh ho , do not insult my hair '', he sasses as he gets up , stumbling a little as he does . She steadies him quickly by grabbing his shoulders , flinching a little at the scar .

''Is it bad ?'', he asks when he catches her action .

She shakes her head ''Not that bad , Friend , I have seen worse , now let's see if you have any more tunics to wear and if you don't , I don't know what we are going to do ''.

''I happen to have one other than the one I wore yesterday , it's green and I don't like green ''.

Carrie lets out a laugh that causes everyone to stare in wonder . She hadn't laughed much in Thedas and hearing her laugh so freely was a true fantastic surprise.

''Get dressed , Shorty , I'll wait for you outside ''. He wasn't offended by the nickname . It was a wonder that he didn't get angry at it . Carrie was very glad he didn't . She didn't want any trouble with her friend .

Because she'd come back this morning the others let her go , Sera , Vivienne and Josephine following her because Varric was after all a man and they were women .

Carrie wasn't surprised when the whole group left the Inn with her . She knew that they won't stay inside while she could show them the city . She just wondered why they didn't explore on their own while she wasn't there .

The sun shone brightly as they trudged through the streets towards the Blue Palace that could be seen towering over some of the surrounding buildings .

''Wow , I didn't get a good look when we arrived '', Josephine says looking at her surroundings with awe ,''it's really a real city ''.

''The City used to be the home of the High King , but Ulfric Stormcloak killed the former with his Voice , shouted him to pieces some guards used to say when I first arrived in Skyrim , later I knew the truth of what Shout he used when I myself learned that same Shout , Torygg wasn't in pieces ,It is the Nord way to challenge the High King for his seat of power ,the Empire saw Ulfric as a Murderer , they don't believe in ancient Nordic ways, one of the guards who'd let Ulfric leave found that out quite clearly when they beheaded him , poor Rogvir ''.

They didn't comment on that , but listened , while wondering how people could execute a man for letting go of another who won fair and square .

They passed the small market place and Carrie pointed out the thief of Bianca' daughter . She told them a short version of how she ended up going down to the docks one day to help Evette get a shipment from the now deceased Vitoria Vici who had been the deceased Emperor's cousin .

''I had to bribe her , but in the end she budged , too bad she was assassinated on her wedding day '', she finishes sadly ,but also guiltily because she had been the one that done the killing , it had been an awful dark month from her life in Skyrim that she never wanted to remember .

''There's the Bard's College '', she says as they pass it by ,''I was part of the College for the fun of it , for a whole month , they send me on missions to retrieve instruments , a drum among others ,anyway I even got to participate in the burning of a cloth dummy that represented King Olaf One - Eye ''.

''Olaf One-Eye ?, sounds like an Avvar name '', Cullen remarks .

''Nord name '', Carrie corrects him ,''all Nords has Clan names , like Ulfric Stormcloak ''.

''Still sounds like an Avvar name to me '', he counters .

''Well, maybe they come from the same place , they are after all in the same world , Cullen''. She wasn't going to call him Commander . In Skyrim his title meant sweet blue nothing .

''Ah, that could be so '', Cullen agrees , letting her win this round .

A young teenager Carrie had met when the teen was a girl of ten years of age rushes past calling to her in a friendly voice '' Hey , Carrie , how's the life of adventuring going ?!''.

Smiling brightly at the teen she calls back ''Alright , Svari , how's your Mama and Papa? ''.

The girl halts a few feet away calling ''Fine , Papa had caught fresh fish today , Mama's going to fry them with this new spice from Hammerfell that a spice merchant had brought in the other day !''.

''Oh , that's nice , hope you enjoy !''.

Svari waves before continuing on her way .

''Rogvir was her Uncle from mother's side '', Carrie explains as they continue as well ,''she really loved Rogvir , poor girl ''. She shakes her head sadly .

Soon they found themselves in the front courtyard of the Blue Palace . A guard stood at the doors into the Palace . Carrie nodded a greeting which he returned ,before letting her in ,eyeing her companions , especially Bull with curious eyes .

The Jarl was busy talking to a man who seemed to be from Dragon's Bridge, when they finally reached the throne room . There was some trouble from a nearby cave .

To Carrie it was quite familiar sounding . Like when she investigated Wolf Skull cave .

She couldn't stop herself from interrupting by walking forward to get the Jarl's attention . The Jarl didn't seem to mind that she did .

''What cave is it ?''.

''Dark Bone '', the man answers immediately .

''And what's wrong with it ?''.

''Strange green glowing lights coming from it ''.

Arching an eyebrow Carrie says ''Well, that doesn't sound good , I'll go investigate it for you Jarl Elisif , if you don't mind , I am headed on that road anyway tomorrow''.

She look at the Jarl who nods in agreement . The man leaves saying his 'Thank You's ' and Carrie look at the Jarl greeting her properly with respect .

''Greetings , Thane Carrie , what brings you here today ''.

''I came to report in , My Jarl , and to introduce some friends from back home , My Jarl , may I introduce Lord Inquisitor Maxwell Trevelyan , The Iron Bull, Varric Thethras , Sera , Dorian Pavus , Commander Cullen Rutherford , Madame Vivienne de Fer , Cole , Warden Blackwall ,Solas and Lady Josephine Montilyet from the far South , Thedas , to be exact, everyone meet Jarl Elisif the Fair ''.

Jarl Elisif smiled at each of them that Carrie points to as she introduces them .''A pleasure '', she says .

Ever the Noble Maxwell steps forward to stand next to Carrie ''The pleasure is all ours , My Lady ,''he says in a charming voice that causes Carrie to frown .

 _When did he become so charming ?...Oh , of course !, he's a damn Noble you idiot !._

It seemed to her the Jarl was immediately mesmerized by him as she looked into those Emerald eyes giggling and blushing like a school girl .

Carrie felt jealous filled anger burst into flame inside of her .

 _Don't giggle like that , he is mine !,_ she screams inside her mind .

With a deep angry frown she takes his arm stating ''Now that , that is out of the way , My Jarl , I … no we will be on our way ''. Her voice are calm like always , but inside her inner dragon rages .

She was not going to give him to that Backboneless woman . No she wasn't .

 _ **SORRY FOR THE DELAY I CAN ONLY POST EACH MONTH END BECAUSE I ONLY HAVE INTERNET THEN . PLEASE REVIEW .**_


	10. Chapter 10

His Heart

Chapter 10

She rushed him out of the Palace , her anger growing with each step . How could Jarl Elisif be charmed by him so quickly ?!. How could he be so charming even?!.

''Kiddo, let go '', he says in a calm voice once they reach the front courtyard .Inwardly he was a bit amused and somewhat confused at why she looked positively livid .

She lets go , but rushes off and they have no choice but to follow her ,quickly , if they didn't want to lose sight of her .

''Kiddo , wait up!'', Varric calls struggling to keep up with this sudden speed his friend showed .

She ignores this in favor of getting to her house quickly . She just needed to get herself to cool off a bit and think of why she got so angry when Elisif showed a slight bit of interest in her Inquisitor .

She had no right to get so angry , she knew , but she did . She still loved him . She could never get rid of those feelings . She had tried to forget him , yet now he was here and what laid dormant was awake . Her heart swelled with her love for him .

She wanted to scream to the world that she loved him !.

She slammed the door to her house open and didn't even care that it startled Meeko who laid quietly on his sleeping mat eating some meat . She didn't care that she left her door open , giving the others access to her private home . She only walked over to a barrel of mead pouring herself some of it into a mug, drinking it in one gulp as if she was thirsty and it was water .

''Kiddo ?'', she heard that oh so deep sexy voice of her Inquisitor coming from behind her .

It was a question , but what he asked she didn't understand as she swings around to face him .

Walking over to her he reaches out a hand to touch her cheek .Lifting a hand she covers his hand with it while closing her eyes briefly to calm herself down .

After a few moments her inner Dragon settles down and she opens her eyes again to look up into those Emerald eyes of his .

For a few moments she gazes into those eyes , but then pull away from him , letting his hand go , causing him to let go of her cheek as well as she takes a few steps backs .

''If you read my letters to Varric , Maxwell, you would know that I am no longer that girl I used to be , I fought my own fights while you ended the war against Corypheus . I've slain numerous dragons , I absorbed their souls because of my Dragonborn ability to kill a fellow Dovah permanently . I became my own person with the freedom of living my life differently in a land void of Templars and rogue mages . A land where the Chantry does not dictate everything one does . Where elves are also people , even if some Nords were racist . Where I could learn magic from a College and not be locked up inside a Circle tower . Where I didn't feel unwanted and useless because I was told so . Where I became a Hero and Protector . Where I was somebody and not a nobody . Yes , I left Skyhold because I was told that if I didn't leave I would regret it . I had to leave to become who I am now , which was , is my destiny . I needed to turn away from that Crybaby I once was to become strong and independent . I needed to be me as I am now . More than the mage . No, I had to become skilled at being a rogue and a warrior as well as an Enchanter , an Alchemist , a Blacksmith . I have learned so much in the years I have been here . New magic too . New cultures as well . And taking on new religions . Becoming the Champion of many a Deadric Prince . Making new friends . Building lasting relationships . I am not who you want me to be . I am Kiddo , yes , but I am also Carrie Snow , Last Dragonborn of Tamriel . My duty to protect her will never end . I and only I are responsible for doing this duty . I know you hoped that maybe I could go back with you when you leave again , but I can't , Skyrim is my home now and here I shall stay , forever . So , if you want to come with me tomorrow , you may , if not it will also be okay , as for now I have nothing more to say on this matter and No, I won't tell you why I had been so angry inside the Blue Palace . Anyway , welcome to Proudspire Manor , my house in Haafingar , I have many houses over Skyrim , you might see them , or not , make yourselves at home , there is room enough for all of you if you want to stay here tonight, tomorrow I need to be on my way again ''.

With her little speech finished she walks over to Meeko to bend down and scratch his ears , ignoring the stares the others gives her , while they also takes in her well furnished house .

''We'll be going with you ,Kiddo , make no mistake , we will help you with anything you want help with , we'd like to see Skyrim as you do '', Maxwell finally says after awhile of silence .

She nods then smiles . He returns it . He understood now that he had to come to terms with this new her if he wanted their relationship to take flame again .

''If you want to write letters to the people back home , be quick , Captain Savellian will be leaving soon enough to go back to Cyrodil and obviously he would be sailing for Thedas again soon '', Carrie had said to them once they had gone back to the Inn to collect their things ,and once they were settled into her house that had enough rooms it seemed to accommodate everyone , even if they had to share .Only the main bedroom was off limits because she was using it as well as Jordis' room .

Now Josephine was sitting at a table , wondering what to write to Leliana about and Cassandra , no , Divine Victoria , while Carrie's dog laid at her feet , keeping watch over her .

Josephine liked the dog that was far smaller than a Mabari . This breed of dog had no name . She had heard Carrie tell that to Varric who'd been fascinated with the dog .

''Meeko's owner died and he was walking on the road trying to attract people to lead back to Meeko's Shack , yes, it is truly called that , anyway , Meeko lead me there and once I had buried his owner I brought him home '', she'd told the dwarf .

Josephine smiles at how Varric seemed to love it here . He and Carrie was such best of friends that she couldn't imagine how it would be if one was to leave again . They really deserved to stay together .

 _ **Dear Leliana**_

 _ **We arrived in Solitude after six months and a week or so . This place is amazing . Well of what I have seen so far .**_

 _ **We are with Kiddo now . Oh , how she have changed . Taking no nonsense from anyone and you should see how strong she looks . She isn't the Mage we used to know . She has many more skills .**_

 _ **She hasn't shown us much of it ,but I am confident that she would eventually .**_

 _ **She even learned to be a Blacksmith . Harrit would have to run for his money when she gets back . The armor she wears is made of Dragon Bone . She told me that it was her best and favourite because she'd smithed it on her own .**_

 _ **This city Solitude , is beautiful and people aren't so buttoned up like those in Val Royeaux , people don't wear masks and their armor isn't for decoration only , no it is quite practical .**_

 _ **Varric got hurt by some Vampire's hound . Kiddo called them Death Hounds .I have yet to see those dogs for myself . Kiddo and Varric says that they are ugly creatures with razor sharp teeth . Varric has a nasty scar to proof that those teeth leaves a nasty mark .**_

 _ **I miss Thedas , but not as much as I thought I would . I have decided to send my fleet from Antiva here to trade . We can learn much from these people . They have no Chantry , no Templars and no Circles as well as Darkspawn .**_

 _ **These people live free and do what they please . They also have a college where they learn Magic . This City also has a Bards College , can you believe it ?.**_

 _ **Kiddo has forgiven you and Cassandra both for what you have said and done . If you saw her you wouldn't think that she is the same person that had left Skyhold .**_

 _ **There are other countries here as well and different races of men and elf . There are what they call Beast Folk too . I haven't seen my first Beast Folk , but I am sure when we travel with Kiddo I would .**_

 _ **I just wanted to say that I am alive and Well . Send my regards to Hawke and Stroud .**_

 _ **And also to King Alistair .**_

 _ **And Duke Gaspard .**_

 _ **Oh , just send my regards to everyone , even the Bull's Chargers .**_

 _ **I hope that you are holding up well in Skyhold . I hope nobody is giving you too much trouble .**_

 _ **Hugs and Friendly Sisterly Kisses**_

 _ **Josephine .**_

Josephine smiled as she sealed the letter into an envelope that Kiddo had provided and looked up to watch the others who had also decided to write . Varric was one of them as well as Bull.

Her eyes wandered to Kiddo who she spied through the kitchen door bending over a pot of stew that smelled delicious.

She couldn't wait to taste it .

She catches Solas' eye from where he stood looking at some of the books on a shelf . She was sure if he could read the language he would've taken a book already .

Footsteps sounding up from the direction of the kitchen causes her to turn her eyes back to Kiddo who walked into the room smiling pleasantly at Varric who had spared her a glance .

''I would take the letters down to the docks if you are finished '', she offers ,''in the meantime , lunch is ready , would you like to eat here or in the kitchen ?''.

''I am hungry , I don' mind where I eat '', Sera says from her seat near Varric eyeing his hand that shifted over the letter .She couldn't see what he was writing , but she could try and peek .Problem was he kept a hand over it , hiding what he was writing .

''Good , at least then you would leave me alone from your damn Eye-Balling, Cupcake '', he grumbles .

Sticking out her tongue at him Sera gets up to follow Kiddo into the kitchen and Josephine gets up to do the same .

Footsteps from behind her tells her that one of the others are following .

It was probably Solas who had given up on trying to choose a book .

Carrie watch her friends eat with a smile . She was glad that they liked the venison stew she had made for them . And not once did Vivienne complain about having no wine to drink .

The honey and snowberry flavored Mead must be something different and tasty .

Her eyes fell on the Inquisitor who peeked at her every few seconds while he ate . She could see that he would like to know something , but she was sure if he finished eating he would ask her .

''Aren't you going to eat ?'', Bull asks when he goes to dish up a second helping for himself .

She shakes her head . ''I don't usually eat lunch , Dinner and Breakfast ,yes , but not lunch ''.

''Funny , I don't remember you not eating lunch back at Skyhold '', Solas comments before spooning some stew into his mouth .

''I did , sometimes , but I am not really a big eater , that won't change , anyhow if all of you are finished I would tell you about tomorrow , because it is important that you know , some of you would need better armor , I will give you what you need , and know this we would have to fight at some point in our travels , be it bandits that attacks us or wild animals ,we will have no other choice if we want to survive , I am currently in the service of a faction called the Dawnguard who hunts Vampires . Skyrim has a big problem with them now and we call it The Vampire Menace , because they have become so bold to the point of attacking cities as you saw with what happened that Varric got munched on by a Death Hound , anyway I am on a mission to a place called Dwimhollow Crypt to investigate unusual Vampire activity there , I was on my way to Morthal that is near the place when I met a merchant that got attacked by bandits , that's how I ended up here in Solitude , I had to escort him here since his whole guard was dead .''

They looked at her waiting for more info ,but got nothing and so Blackwall asks ''Who needs better armor ?, we kind of like ours the way it is ''.

'' I meant , Josephine , the mages and rogues and some of the warriors , you also need better weapons , what can you wield Josephine ?''.

Josephine looked at the girl an incredulous look on her face . Was Kiddo really suggesting that she would have to fight ?.

''A dagger mostly '', she answers ,''but I am not really good with it , I am after all a noble and not some petty rogue or warrior ''.

Narrowing her eyes slightly at Josephine's choice of wording, Carrie feels like hitting her for that .

''A blade is needed if one wants to survive , Josephine , even the High King and the Jarls uses weapons , and they are nobles ,I have seen the High King fight and he is quite good . It doesn't matter if you are a mere peasant , a merchant or a damn noble , all that matters is that you do know how to defend yourself , anyway , I shall give you daggers and a sword , whichever you use is up to you , you shall have to fight if you are to travel with us ''.

Josephine felt her cheeks warm at the fierce reprimand coming from the woman who was not so long ago a slip of a girl with only the title of Mage behind her name . She nods as she decides that if Carrie could become someone different , she could too .

Carrie nodded back before looking at Varric .

''I should take you to Beirand's forge so I can smith you armor that would fit your frame , I think I'll have to smith a set for Sera too as well as Cole , the rest of the armor I have will surely fit everyone else, even Solas that are a bit bigger than the average elf . I do have a set of Mer armor that would fit him . It is heavy , but I am sure it would suite him well and for Bull I have set of Orcish armor that never would've fit me , even if I tried , I swear it was probably made for a big Orc , until I can smith you all a better set each it'll have to do , oh and Bull, don't worry the chest pieces won't come near your horns , they fit loosely over your back and front, we'll go to the forge once we're finished with handing of the letters to Captain Savellian ''.

''You're going to smith armor ?'', Dorian asks skeptically in that cocky voice of his .

''I am '', she says bluntly .

'' Pfft, you can't even smith a mouse trap '', he scoffs .

Glaring at him she says challengingly ''Come along and see if you don't believe me ''.

Rolling his eyes he says ''Fine , but you owe me if you don't deliver ''.

''And you shall shut your mouth on any more comments , Milk Drinker! '', she snaps ,''I am going to smith armor and you will lose ''.

With that she leaves the kitchen to go wait for them outside her house .

''Hey , Beirand , may I use your forge ?!'', Carrie calls half an hour later .

''Of course '', he answers ,''you are always welcome to use it ''.

''Thanks , I may need some materials if you have them in stock ''.

''Just tell me what you need and I shall see what I have ''.

Carrie ignored the other's stares as she pulled on a blacksmith's apron that Beirand hands her .

All of them had come to see her work , most of them believing what Dorian did , that she was all talk and no show .

She bought some materials from Beirand before she measured Varric first , then got to work . She had a lot of work to finish since she had three sets of armor to smith and it was already afternoon.

 _Why didn't I think of this , this morning ?, could've had some of them finished by now ._

It took her two hours of tinkering to smith Varric a set of Dragon Bone armor in the style of Dwemer armor . She let Maxwell fit it onto the stocky man , who everyone , who passed by eyed curiously .

After him she measured Sera who was more than happy to let her, now that she and the others had seen how efficient Carrie was in her smithing skills . They had watched her with shocked fascination when Varric's armor took form . They couldn't believe their eyes . Carrie had to suppress a laugh at their comical expressions .

 _Serves them right to not having believed me ._

Varric looked good in his armor . Far better than he had in that old Carta outfit he had, had long ago when most of the Inner Circle wasn't part of the Inquisition yet . When Carrie was good enough to travel with the Herald on his first trip to the Hinterlands . When it was just her , him , Cassandra , Solas and Varric .

She sighs inwardly at remembering that .

She finished Sera's Dragon Bone armor in record time . It was in the Elfish style , and it fit her like a glove .

She measured Cole and got to work while the sun went down and she had to work by the lamplights as well as the little light the coals of the forge gave off .

When she was finished , she herself fitted Cole's armor on him ignoring the jealous glare Maxwell gave her and the young man .

He would have to learn that it wouldn't help to be jealous . That Cole was only a sort of friend and she wasn't sure if she should pursue another relationship with him, Maxwell .

They walked back to her house in the dark , with only here and there a lamplight lighting the way . She looked up at the twin moons , smiling at the beauty that was Skyrim's sky . The Aurora also showed its beautiful vibrant colors .

Jordis was home , cooking dinner when they got there and Carrie introduced her friends to her Housecarl who smiled and accepted them just as she had accepted many a friend of Carrie's .

Cullen seemed to eye this young woman who was dressed in a different armor set than Carrie . She was beautiful , though , in a fierce way .

When all of them ate their dinner , that consisted of fish caught by Jordis herself ,they said their goodnights and went off to bed .

Carrie was in her room when Maxwell came to her to speak to her for a bit .

She didn't mind it when he reached out to give her a hand with her armor . At least she wasn't naked under her armor .

She wasn't sure she wanted him to see her body .

''Kiddo , now that we have time to speak , please tell me why you didn't come talk to me first before you left Skyhold? . A letter was alright , but it wasn't you . I would've done anything and everything in my power to protect you from Leliana and Cassandra . I missed you with each day that passed by . I was angry at first . I thought you a fickle person .A coward even .But I forgave you as the days became years .''

She turns to look at him wondering why he even wanted to know . Haven't she given her explanation earlier ?.

''Fate changed things '', she says , her voice firm , truly believing her own words ,'' I was supposed to leave Skyhold so that I could come here and become who I am now , Maxwell , I am sorry if I left , I am sorry I was a coward , but you have to admit I was a useless crybaby who only needed some protection without being able to protect herself , I mean look at what happened to me . That assassin was able to hurt me and I wasn't able to save myself . Now I can save myself . I am stronger than I ever was and I am a better me ''.

He looks at her wishing that she didn't make sense , but she did and he really liked the new her .

'' I still love you '', he blurts .

She smiles '' I still love you too , Inquisitor , ''she says softly ,''but now you need to go to bed , we'll have plenty of time to built up our relationship again on the road , while we do badass things ''.

He couldn't help but laugh at that . She was way more fun it seemed .

Dawn found them eating breakfast in the kitchen . On another table various armor pieces and weapons were laid out . One particular piece was big and made of some strong dark green metal .

Bull's they supposed as their eyes drifted to the table every few seconds .

Carrie already wore her Dragon Bone armor and her helmet was next to her on the table . It was a horned piece that looked fearsome .

After breakfast she began handing out the armor , giving that big piece to Bull who it fit like a glove , much like Sera's had . Solas got a set of armor , boots and all , that shined in the light of the lamps that lit the kitchen . He stripped then and there without caring who saw him . Carrie saw some of the women blush and turn their heads away , but she who had seen many things since coming to Skyrim just shrugged and continued handing out the armor .

She helped Maxwell get his own set of Dragon Bone armor on and didn't even flinch when he touched her hips in a seductive way . At least her hips were covered by her armor and she couldn't feel a thing .

Next she handed out the weapons , making sure that even the mages got a sword or a dagger to use , though , she doubted that they'd need them . She gave Bull a huge Dragon Bone war hammer that looked more like a knee bone of a Dragon than anything else .

She handed Cullen a sword made of Dragon Bone as well . All warriors got swords or hammers or an axe.

The rogues , Varric included , got daggers and Sera got a beautiful Dragon Bone bow .

They were all ready by 8 and left the city , making their way towards the city gates . They made a formidable sight as they walked . Some of the guards felt fear in their hearts as the group passed them by .

They reached the gates in record time , heading outside to the road that will lead them to Dark Bone cave and eventually to Morthal .

They still needed to investigate the cave anyhow for the Jarl .

They passed the stables of Solitude and Carrie spots a familiar horse eating some hay . She shakes her head thinking of how unfortunate she is now of finding her trusty steed Shadowmere when she didn't need him because she wasn't going to ride while her friends walked .

She passed by quickly before he could spot her , confusing the others , making them wonder what made her pick up the pace .

The sun was already high in the sky when they reach the cave that sat on the side of the road marked by a dead corpse on a spike .

''Bandits was here '', Carrie says as she points to the corpse while ignoring the gagging sounds Josephine makes . The others made no sound having been used to such things because of the Inquisition .

''How can you tell ?'', Maxwell asks , eyeing the corpse in disgust .

''Helgen is overrun by bandits and outside the gates you'll find corpses like these '', Carrie explains , unsheathing her sword and taking on a sneaking pose . She wasn't going to rush in . Only a fool would .

The others follows her example . Not all of them getting it right , but trying nonetheless .

They walked through the entrance into a cavernous room filled with nothing but dirt and an upside down turned cart .

''Looks like it's empty '', Varric remarks .

Carrie shakes her head ''Not really true , most likely the bandits are through that doorway over there .'' She points to a hole in the wall only big enough for one person to step through at a time .

''Green everything is green , oh what a beautiful shiny light , why is it so bright ?'', Cole speaks up for the first time since arriving in Skyrim .

Everyone turns to look at him , including Carrie .

''Can you sense what the green light is ?'', she asks him .

He nods ''Yes , it is from the Fade , like the Inquisitors mark '', he says .

Everyone stares at him surprised at those words , some gasping .

''Is it a rift ?'', Maxwell asks him .

Cole shrugs ''I don't know , but we should go see ''.

They all nods and Carrie motions for Maxwell to take the lead . If it was a rift only he would be able to close it .

Now wasn't the time or the place to get jealous or even angry that he was stealing her role as Hero . She would let him because she wasn't the kind of person who wanted to be the only Hero . There was a place for everyone on that tree .

She smiled as she pictured hundreds of Heroes sitting in a huge tree. They would be a real sight .

 _ **Welcome to the end of this one . Hope you enjoyed ! Oh and I don't own The Elder Scrolls or Dragon Age Bioware and Bethesda does .**_


End file.
